Story Challenge #24: 26th May 2004
Complete and continue: "The [...] exploded ..." Time limit: ten minutes.

Probes
A 10-minute SW ficlet by Morgan D.

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The air exploded around his body, forcing itself into his lungs, whipping his skin like icy daggers, howling with fury into his ears, and ripping apart the solid, deadly shroud that had caged and suffocated him for what had felt to be eternity. The disorientation and the assault of nauseating scents threatened to shake Luke awake from the vision, away from the unbearable chaos Han's mind had been hurled into.

It was the first time Luke tried to self-induce a vision, deliberately sending his mind after that spot in the present that he wanted to observe; before, he had always surrendered to the Force's will instead, and let himself be taken by the tides of time and space. This time, however, he had a specific purpose.

He had to be with Han when he was freed from the carbonite.

Luke's grasp of the vision was tenuous at best. It was hardly a vision, actually, as it was composed more of jumbled feelings than images. And he doubted he would have had any success if his emotional link to the two people in it had been any less strong.

Also, he didn't feel quite right about doing it. Maybe the Force resented being coerced like that. Maybe it was trying to warn him about the selfish aspects of that purpose. Maybe he simply didn't have the right to be there, to intrude on that moment. But Luke told himself that all he wanted was to make sure that Han was okay, and held on.

Han was far from okay. He was blind, confused, lost, cold... What rotten luck, to be unfrozen in the one place on Tatooine whose owner could afford to keep cold and damp. Luke tried to project calm and warmth into his friend's hectic thoughts, but Han's mind wasn't nearly as receptive as Leia's, and the physical distance was considerable. It was like trying to make himself heard from the other side of the galaxy, over the chorus of a thousand orchestras playing different tunes at the same time. Like trying to embrace someone wearing a five-inch thick armour.

Like reaching for the unreachable.

But suddenly, something breached through the mass of fear and disorientation, causing another sensorial overload... and Han was okay. He was still blind, but immersed in light. Still confused, but in peace. Still lost, but not alone. Still cold, but loved.

Leia was in his arms.

Luke recoiled from Han's mind, burned by the intensity of the Corellian's feelings. He had known what he would find there, he had known what to expect, and he had always known that the name he would find engraved in Han's heart wouldn't be his. And still, he hadn't managed to prepare himself to sense the real thing. Or perhaps no amount of preparation would have ever been enough.

Why did it have to hurt so much? There had been no hopes to be crushed there, and yet Luke felt now as if a black hole had opened above him to swallow his entire existence away from history. If he had known that it would be this painful anyway, maybe he would have dared to hope, would have dared to enjoy the brief joy of deluding himself a little with the possibility of having Han's love.

Control, he had to regain control. Too much was at stake, and there was no time to whimper about his disastrous love life. He needed to keep focused on the situation at hand, on what had to be done.

So he closed his perception to Han. Completely. He couldn't allow Han's feelings to distract him.

It became even harder to maintain the vision. Luke barely managed it, by anchoring himself to Leia's presence. It hurt a lot less that way, perhaps because Leia's feelings were so similar to his own. Nonetheless, he still felt like an intruder, sensing her deep relief for seeing Han alive, for being able to hold him and kiss him and feel him...

But even that was gone in a second. A swift instant of perfect clarity, when he heard curtains being drawn open and sordid laughter mocking the lovers in Huttese... before the vision faded irremediably.

It took Luke a long while to calm down his fast breathing. It took him even longer to decide to open his eyes and get on his feet, as he knew that rushing into Jabba's palace with fear for his loved ones guiding his actions would only mean repeating the same mistake he had made on Bespin. Misery and death would follow him everywhere if he failed to learn from his errors.

He looked up to the sky, letting the sight of the starry night over the endless dunes appease his soul. The Force smiled at him, no longer resenting his touch.

Nasty battles awaited him, he knew. Rescuing his friends now would only be the first one. He would need the most tranquil heart to succeed.

Therefore, he offered the Force the silent promise that he would never allow himself to be tempted to pry into Han's feelings again. He already knew what he had to know.

It was time to move on.

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