One of Takamura-san's cousins had married a European woman. Spanish or Italian, the old man didn't quite remember. Or was she Greek? But Takamura-san did remember his cousin's visit to Japan, bringing the wife and their four children, back in 1986. It was harder to forget that than the big earthquake in Kobe in 1995.

That woman simply didn't behave like a woman should do ¾ in the old man's opinion. She didn't know her place, and argued every single order her husband gave her. She spoke too loud, and their kids were allowed to speak even louder. One hour in the company of that family and Takamura-san was ready to either cut off his own ears or commit multiple murder.

And when his cousin left with his flock of bell-birds, Takamura-san wrote down three solemn principles to be followed throughout his whole life.

One, never get married.

Two, never have kids.

And three, never get near anything that might remotely look like those four detestable kids arguing for the last piece of pizza.

Principle number three kept Takamura-san comfortably sat on the sofa of the antechamber staring at the eight ogres lying unconscious on the floor, while his three young guides and whoever was with them in the other room yelled at the top of their lungs. And as long as the screams kept coming, he wasn't moving at all.

For a moment the shouts were gone, actually. The place was so silent that Takamura-san would have heard his own heartbeat ¾ if he were alive. But the moment passed and the screaming started all over again. I guess someone brought a new pizza, he muttered to himself.

~*~

For a brief moment, Mukuro had turned her attention away from Kurama, noticeably concerned ¾ if still keeping a cold façade ¾ with her young heir. Needless to say, everyone else in the room had piercing eyes directed mercilessly at Hiei too.

Which meant that, for that brief moment, Kurama was able to let his fatigue show, closing weary eyelids and leaning on an exotic piece of furniture to take some weight away from his feet. He could feel the blood pounding through his every vein, and his throat was sorely dry.

And all of a sudden he understood why Yusuke had been so hostile towards him since that non-emotion spell had started. At Hiei's cold, careless and very unemotional "So what?", the Youko wanted nothing but to grab the little Fire Demon by the shoulders and slap some sense into that spiky-haired head of his. A quick glance at his flabbergasted teammates proved he wasn't the only one feeling that way.

Feeling... Kurama was feeling. Loathsome thing. Why had he missed it? If he had any control over that manipulation power, Kurama would have used his last grain of ki sparing himself from that awful experience.

But then, he sighed, that's exactly what I just did...

He shifted his gaze back to Hiei... and found the Jaganshi frowning slightly at him. Belatedly, Kurama remembered that he was still holding Hiei's wrist so tight that the fingers of both demons had turned white, deprived of blood circulation.

Kurama told his fingers to let go ¾ they didn't obey.

"Hhhhhiei...."

For a moment the redhead feared that the hoarse, enraged hiss had come from his constricted throat, defying his will as well. But this time it was Yusuke's ki aura that expanded in fury, revealing the passion of emotions barely under control.

Hiei turned his attention away from Kurama with clear reluctance, looking up at Urameshi's contorted features. The Fire Demon said nothing. Just waited for the blow.

"Hiei." The name came out more soberly, but still rang painfully in everyone's ears. "Hiei..."

Alarmed at the thick waves of youki flooding the room, Kuwabara rested a hand on Yusuke's shoulder. "Oi... Urameshi?" he whispered.

Kuwabara failed to see it happening: Yusuke crumpled and dropped the stolen file on the floor and grabbed Hiei's neck, swiftly hoisting the little demon in the air and pressing him against the wall. "Hiei... you..." Pulling him forward for a second, Yusuke shove Hiei back to the wall, banging the youkai's head on the concrete. "...COWARD!!!"

The movement snatched Hiei's hand from Kurama's, and a wave of nausea hit the Youko hard. "Yusuke... wait..."

"You despicable little bastard!" Urameshi roared at the Jaganshi's face. "You fight to the end! No matter what, you fight to the end! Till your last ki! You hear me?"

"Yusuke, calm down!" Koenma ordered him.

"What you can't incinerate, you burn!" Yusuke went on, his fingers tightening the grip around the thin neck. "What you can't burn, you slash into pieces. What you can't slash, you punch with all your strength."

Hiei withstood the glare passively, as his breathing started to fail.

"And what you can't punch, you spit at!" Urameshi yelled even louder. "That's the Hiei I knew! Fall, but don't bend! That's what you taught me!"

Unexpected as a flame burning inside an ice block, a faint smile appeared on the Jaganshi's face. "A fool's... lesson," he choked.

"Urameshi, you're strangling him!" Kazuma warned.

"Yes, I am!" Yusuke bellowed, pounding the small body against the wall once more. "And it feels so damned good!!!"

"Let him go, Yusuke," Koenma ordered. "His life belongs to Reikai now. I have enough paperwork to fix as it is."

"I'm not surrendering you my heir, Koenma-chan," Mukuro put in sedately. "No matter what your paperwork says."

But if Yusuke kept clutching Hiei by the neck for a couple of minutes more, the argument between Koenma and Mukuro would be proved pointless. "Urameshi, give him a punch on the stomach and leave it at that," advised Kuwabara. "You don't really want to kill him."

Kurama thought he was hallucinating. Was that a smile on Hiei's face?

"You think I'm kidding?" Yusuke snarled, pulling the youkai's black hair with the left hand, but still strangling him with the right. "You think this is funny?"

Hiei frowned in pain, reminding Kurama how sensitive the little demon's scalp was. But the hint of a smile was still there.

"You bowed out of the fight, Hiei!" Yusuke accused. And at this point, he couldn't think of a worst sin. Who was that scrawny creature hanging from his grasp? It couldn't be the teammate he had trusted so readily. Or the dangerous Majin who had nearly chopped him into pieces about four years before. Or the Master of the implacable Black Dragon. Or the friend who had so cleverly helped him to gather the strength to confront Sensui.

The memory of a melancholic Hiei looking as hurt and helpless as an abandoned child as he caressed a tress of Toushin Yusuke's hair threatened to demolish Urameshi's wrath palisade, but he pushed the image away and held on to the anger. He feared his whole sanity would be gone if he let it go now. "You bowed out! After all your arrogant bravado, all your mocking snorts and the cold-blooded pose, you pick up a stupid duel to reveal the pathetic chicken you are?! What happened to you? Got tired? Bored?"

"Sort... of," Hiei managed, gasping for air. His arms hanged loosely, undefensively, and there was no mistake about the intriguing curve upward delineating his lips.

Yusuke let go of the neck but pulled the hair even harder, clenching his right hand in a glowing fist, ready to sock that smile with all his power. "And you simply throw in the towel?!"

Apart from filling his lungs with the damp air of the room and coughing, the youkai didn't move. "Exactly... You have a problem with that?"

Urameshi distantly felt his fangs growing inside his mouth, and his arms and shoulders felt warm under the clothes, where the demonic dark blue marks started to appear. As always, the transformation began without any conscious decision, only in the track of the feelings charring his guts. In that moment Yusuke hated Hiei so radically, he wanted to see the youkai's head explode in blood under his fist. "How could you...? You're nothing but a coward!"

"So maybe I am," Hiei sighed tiredly. "I don't know. Didn't you read that in my file?"

Yusuke froze, his jaw trembling with the might of his emotions. The file...

The file.

Hiei, true name Imigo.

Forbidden Child.

And the look... the betrayed look of those ruby eyes when they opened to see that the Toushin marks had disappeared from Yusuke's body the day after Sensui's death.

With a growl of exasperation, Yusuke let go of Hiei's hair and stepped back, wishing madly that the worlds would choose that precise moment to collide in a supernova explosion, so he wouldn't have to deal with any of this anymore. He closed his eyes for a second, forcing his own ki to recede...

When he opened them back, his body had returned to his usual human features. And everybody in the room was staring at him.

With a dangerous scowl, Yusuke reached the doorway with four heavy steps and turned to glance at Mukuro, then Hiei. "You know what? When I came here I wanted so much to beat the shit out of the one who killed you." He smirked, with no humor whatsoever. "Now guess what. I still wanna do that." With that, he walked out of the room. If the doors were closed, he would clearly have kicked them down.

As the angry half-human got out of sight, Hiei's eyes automatically searched for Kurama's... and winced with what they found.

Humor. Dark, despairing humor.

"I knew," the redhead whispered, a dead smile curving his lips.

The youkai bit his lip, gazing solemnly at his former partner. Finding nothing to say.

"Or I sort of knew, as you would say," Kurama added, lost in distant remembrances. "You almost told me, didn't you?"

Hiei nodded somberly. The memories of their last conversation were far from pleasant.

"And I almost knew," Kurama laughed and glanced at Kuwabara. "I would have known, if I wanted to. But I knew enough not to want to know."

Kuwabara seemed to understand that crazy blabbering. Hiei didn't, and the visible tremor in Kurama's hands disturbed him more than if the whole fortress were caving in. "Kurama..."

"And you see, Kuwabara-kun?" Kurama went on, getting on his feet with a tired moan. "I was right after all. Dying like that..." He looked straight into Hiei's eyes, letting all his weariness to show. "...it's just like you."

Hiei's eyebrows shifted uncomfortably next to the closed Jagan as Kurama hauled himself out of the room. He hardly recognized the Youko that had been his friend, his enemy, his lover and part of his life for... far too long. His ki signature felt so convoluted and distorted, not to mention weak, that Hiei was almost positive that the redhead was either sick or an impostor. And he was behaving so strangely that the youkai felt tempted to believe in the latter.

"He's... ahn..." murmured a puzzled voice behind him. "He's having a hard day."

Hiei turned to look at the carrot-haired boy, realizing that he didn't had much of a chance of doing so for the last three years. Yusuke didn't change a thing, obviously ¾ and the Fire Demon had last seen him just a few months before. Kurama... looked the same and felt different. But Kuwabara was still the tall, bulky, brawny ningen Hiei remembered, with that same ridiculous hairstyle, but his features and the gleam in his eyes seemed so... The word that came to Hiei's mind was "mature". The others, tinged by their demonic natures, hadn't aged much or at all. The thoroughbred human Kazuma Kuwabara on the other hand...

Three years was a long time for ningen. Hiei kept forgetting that. "And you?" he challenged. "Aren't you saying something?"

Kuwabara shrugged, the shadow of defeat curving his shoulders. "Saying what? That you're a complete asshole? I think you should know that already." He bowed slightly to Mukuro out of courtesy, since she was being awfully civil about the invasion of her fortress and bedroom, and moved to the doorway. "Besides, I really don't feel like arguing with you this time."

Hiei saw him leave, the disappointment in the human's voice piercing his ears. After all the insults Kuwabara had thrown at him over the years, for the first time Hiei felt actually insulted.

While the Jaganshi stared dejectedly at the open door, Koenma moved swiftly to get the slate-colored folder from the floor. "Hah! This goes back with me!" Then, pointing triumphantly to Hiei, "And so do you."

~*~

Flukes and coincidences were part of the daily life of strong-spirited people. Kuwabara was also strong enough to understand those coincidences as his own reiki guiding him through life, offering him the means and weapons to surpass obstacles that didn't even become fact yet. That talent could be translated in feeling suddenly hungry and going to the kitchen in time to hold his mother when she slipped on the wet floor... Or in deciding to visit Genkai's temple in the very day the contest that would define her successor started... Or in having attended a debate in the school auditorium the week before. The theme had been suicide.

He still remembered most of the arguing clearly. Some lads yelling that it was a repugnant coward's act, others stating that nothing could be braver than willingly facing the unknown... Not to mention the thrill of tension when religious codes were invoked. Do our lives belong to ourselves, to the country or to the gods? Will the ones who kill themselves be forever punished or glorified? Should we respect them or spit on their graves? And if someone was bold enough to bring up the kamikaze... Kazuma moaned in remembrance.

Shizuru had been surprised to know her kid brother had felt any urge to watch that kind of event ¾ surprised and worried. She probably sensed my reiki taking me there, he mused, dragging his heavy, gloomy feet away from Mukuro's chambers. And then started to wonder why the hell I would need lessons on suicide.

Now he had the answer.

Did the lesson help?

Not so much, Kuwabara admitted.

It was one thing to argue about morals and abstract values. But as incensed as people could get about this kind of debate, it was nothing compared to learning that one of your closest friends dared to take this path.

Reaching the antechamber gate, Kazuma rested his hands on the knobs... and paused, stricken by a hazy memory. When the discussion had turned into a tiring quarrel between a Catholic and a Buddhist, a shy short-haired young woman raised a vacillating hand and spoke in a low, frail voice: "My mother committed suicide six years ago. For a long time after that I couldn't make myself talk about her or even say her name, and I burned all her letters and pictures. I hated her for not caring enough for me to keep on living."

Apart from a snooty kid that offered a nasty riposte and accused her of digression, no one dared to comment her testimony. Kazuma had felt sad for her and made a point of growling at the snooty kid's face his profound distaste for those who belittle the mourning of a woman, but other than that he didn't think much of it and left the auditorium shortly after.

If Urameshi has any letters or pictures of Hiei in his pockets, he's practicing his Shotgun on them right now, thought Kuwabara, remembering the way Yusuke had crumpled the shrimp's file ¾ or the shrimp's neck, for that matter. And Kurama...

Poor fellow. Since shock and brutal tension are usually catalyzers for the greatest developments regarding spiritual energy, those revelations seldom picked a good occasion to show themselves. The Youko had now, at the same time, to deal with what he had just learned about his best friend and also about himself. Kuwabara didn't envy him.

He had no difficulties understanding his teammates' anger against Hiei, just as he had easily comprehended the anguish of the woman at the debate. From a certain perspective, it was a huge betrayal. A mother should be there to protect her offspring to the end. And Hiei, as Yusuke implied, was supposed to be the unbendable one. Everyone else could scream in panic and pull all hairs out of their heads, but the little cranky demon would just find a perch on a tree branch or windowsill and snort his disdain at the worlds. Kuwabara and the others trusted Hiei to do exactly that, to keep standing and smirking cynically no matter what. His stubborn comings and goings seemed only to prove time and again how indispensable his aloof attitude was to the team.

Kazuma still shivered at the image of Hiei cringing helplessly inside Itsuki's shadow-creature while they watched the agonizing fight between Sensui and Urameshi. The thick drops of cold sweat running down the youkai's tense face was a clear sign that the sky was about to fall on their heads.

A few minutes later, Yusuke Urameshi would be lying dead before them.

In a way, that was a suicide too, Kuwabara grimaced. There was nothing new about running to death in the hands of a stronger enemy. Yusuke had done it against Sensui; Kurama, against Karasu; Kuwabara himself, against Toguro Otouto. But in all those cases there was a purpose, a commitment to the team, the loyalty to friends and allies. What Hiei did, on the other hand... "What the hell did he think he was doing?"

"Who?"

Kuwabara jumped so high, he almost slammed his head against the ceiling. "Aaaaaaargh! Jiisan, don't sneak up on me!"

Takamura-san shrugged. "I've been here for ages, but you froze there like a statue! I thought you had fallen asleep on your feet."

"I was just..." The boy trailed off, blinking. "Jiisan, what are you doing here?"

"I followed you."

"WHAT?!"

"I thought you and your friends would go looking for the so-called Prince of Reikai, so I decided to come along," the old man explained. "I need to have a chat with this guy."

Kazuma's eyes widened in puzzlement. "A chat with Koenma? About what?"

Takamura-san rolled his eyes, scratched his nape. "Oh... let's see... what was it about?" Suddenly his smile broadened sarcastically and he snapped his fingers. "Hah! Now I remember. I'm dead!"

Kuwabara put the hands in his pockets, his shoulder bending slightly forward. "That happens, jiisan."

"Yeah," the old man nodded. "To some people more than others."

"I beg your pardon?"

"If your colorful friends can be resurrected," Takamura-san pointed at the door that had sheltered the awful discussion between the teammates a moment ago, "so can I!"

Kazuma fell against the gate, dumbfounded. "But... but... jiisan, I told you... They're different..."

"I can't accept that a bunch of kids... no offense..."

"None taken," Kuwabara replied distractedly, his mind focused in all the nasty things he would hear from Botan for letting the old man escape from Reikai.

"...have more privileges than I do! Fifty years of taxes should pay for something!"

"I don't think Reikai gets any part of the cash from Ningenkai taxes," the boy murmured.

"Then where the money for your salary came from?" Takamura-san folded his arms adamantly. "You said you used to work for them."

"I didn't receive any salary..."

The old man frowned. "They didn't pay for your work?"

"Ahn..." Kazuma bit his lip. "No."

"What?!" Takamura-san choked. "What does the syndicate have to say about that?"

Kuwabara rubbed his feet on the floor, embarrassed. Was there a Reikai Workers Union? Maybe I should ask George...

"Let me see if I understand this correctly," the old man hissed. "You worked for nothing? Not even peanuts?"

"Well... two of my teammates had to do it. They were criminals under parole, so it was either work as Tantei or be sent back to jail."

The old man's frown increased considerably.

"And Urameshi was resurrected under the condition that he would work for them," Kuwabara continued. "So he would die again if he refused."

Takamura-san's mouth fell open.

"But I don't think he knew about that until after he was resurrected," Kazuma added thoughtfully, leaning against the gate. "I remember Botan commenting something of the sort, at least..." His eyes focused back on the spirit before him and he fell silent. The man was livid, his eyes in turmoil, and Kuwabara sensed easily the dark depths of indignation devouring him. "Jiisan?"

Takamura-san swallowed painfully and fought to regain his composure. "What about you, son?" he asked gently. "Why did you have to work for them?"

"Me?" Kuwabara perked up. "I couldn't let Urameshi get all the credit and fun. Besides, he would be lost without the help and guidance of Kazuma Kuwabara, the man and hero, guardian of humankind, protector of the weak, defender of the..." BONK!

The old wooden gate wasn't strong enough to withstand the brave fighter's enthusiasm, its lock yielding to his weight and opening to the access hallway. Unfortunately, that caused the great Kazuma Kuwabara to land clumsily on his butt right in front of the soldiers that guarded the gate from outside.

The boy's cheeks burned as the demons started to laugh out loud. "Temee!" He was about to jump on his feet and chase those idiots to the end of Makai when he saw Takamura-san's stretched hand. Looking up at his face, Kuwabara found a warm, honest smile.

"Don't mind them, son," said the old man. "All those monsters laughing together aren't nearly as loud as you are."

The tone was affectionate; the words, not so much. It sounded a lot as one of Kurama's remarks. Uncertain, Kazuma accepted the hand and got on his feet.

Abruptly, the demons ceased their laughter.

"Thanks, jiisan," Kuwabara muttered.

"A ghost!" cried one of the guards. "The ningen talks to ghosts!"

"I don't see anyone," another frowned. "Maybe I hit his head so hard, he's hallucinating."

"Of course you can't see it, Nagao," a third one groaned. "It's a ghost!"

"You see?" yelled the first. "I told you he was stronger than ordinary humans..."

"Oh shut up, Bikko!"

Takamura-san arched an eyebrow. "Those monsters are afraid of ghosts?!"

Kuwabara blinked... then grinned evilly as an idea struck him. "Of course they're afraid of you, jiisan. Even those poor bastards can sense the amount of your dark power, even in death."

Some of the demons glared at him; others trembled.

"Hey, Nagao... Can you feel it? I never sensed anything like this before."

"What kind of creature can keep its powers even in death?"

"I know! It's a Gurokya! I'm sure of that!"

"I loathe gurokyas... They can't be trusted."

"Ssh! You want him to hear you?"

"I don't sense a thing..."

"Shut up, Bikko!"

Stiffening proudly, Kuwabara passed his arm around the old man. "Come, jiisan. Let's find a place with better air. It stinks here."

There was no mistake this time: the demons were all hostile glares at the arrogant human crossing the hallway in a half-embrace with the invisible Gurokya. But no one dared to move or say anything against them, even those who guessed that, considering the position of the ningen's arm, this Gurokya must be incredibly short and thin...

Laughing his lungs out, Takamura-san patted Kuwabara's back. "Son, I like your style. I really do."

But Kazuma's thoughts had returned to the image of an angry Botan ¾ who had spent two hours chasing the old man's spirit ¾ brandishing her oar dangerously over his head. "You shouldn't be here, jiisan," he whispered, so the guards wouldn't hear him. "This could cause a lot of trouble."

Takamura-san's good mood vanished instantly. "I'm not going back. Not before giving the Reikai hotshot a piece of my mind. He's here, isn't he?"

The boy sighed. "He's here. But there's a lot going on right now..."

"Let me guess... He's too busy to receive a John Doe like me."

Kuwabara twitched his lips. Actually he didn't really know Koenma's part in the whole mess. The shrimp shouldn't be alive, but he is. What's the brat gonna do? He can't simply kill him again to fix the problem. He shivered. Can he?

"I got enough of this when I was alive," Takamura-san went on. "And you know what? I'm sick and tired and dead of it. I won't take it anymore. I have a lot to live before kicking the bucket, and this guy will have to listen to me."

"Jiisan... A friend of mine is in trouble with him. Deep trouble. If you go there now, I'm afraid Koenma will get pissed off and drop the hammer on him instead." All of a sudden, a puzzling thought gained space in Kazuma's mind. "Listen, jiisan. You wait for a while more, until my friend is clear, and I'll take you to someone who can help you. Deal?"

The old man tilted his head, visibly suspicious. But he knew about moody bosses who let out their anger on the wrong subjects, just to feel good. "All right," he nodded. "I trust you."

"Thanks, jiisan."

"It's not like I'll grow much older as I wait anyway... But tell me, son. Have you found the mountain you were looking for?" Takamura-san asked, curious.

"Hiei is not a mountain, jiisan," Kazuma sighed, glancing back at the antechamber's wooden gate. "He's no mountain at all."

~*~

"I don't think you realize the true scope of your demands, Koenma-chan."

"And I don't think you realize the true depth of the trouble you were getting into when you decided to challenge my father's authority!"

"Hiei is my appointed heir. He left your Tantei team, with your permission, seven months before the Shigure incident. That means he was, and still is, under my authority."

Koenma pursed his lips angrily. He hadn't really give his permission. But Botan's status allowed her some autonomy of resolution. As furious as he had been for seeing Hiei walk away after only a few months of parole, it would have been bad policy to counter her judgment. "He's dead, Mukuro. And all dead creatures are under Reikai's authority."

"Except perhaps when your dead creature is still breathing and moving and glaring daggers at us," Mukuro suggested playfully.

Hiei rolled his eyes. Did he really have to sit there and listen to that crap? He'd rather be strangled by Yusuke a thousand times... "What makes you think I'll let either of you order me around? You two can shove your authorities in your respective asses, for all I care."

Koenma sent a baleful look in the short youkai's direction. Mukuro suppressed a grin. Good. He's not as depressed as I feared he'd be. His former teammates would have to learn the truth sooner or later, she never doubted it. It happened a lot later than she had expected, actually ¾ Reikai's information service was certainly a fiasco.

"Just because you got away last time because of a technicality, it doesn't mean I'll let it happen again," Koenma muttered, his tone filled with resentment. "You're dead. This file in my hand says so."

Hiei arched his eyebrows to the rumpled folder the other was brandishing proudly. "Then I think that file might be lacking some accuracy," he gnarled sarcastically.

The impish edge on his voice was too subtle to be noticed by anyone but Mukuro. This isn't just a blunder from some Reikai bureaucrat, then...

"I doesn't matter," Koenma shrugged. "So what if you're still breathing? We can fix that."

The Jaganshi froze, uncertain if he should laugh or worry. He can't be serious!

Pleased with Hiei's reaction, the Prince of Death smiled broadly. "I thought of letting Yusuke fix that for me, since he seemed so eager to do it. But like I said, that would force me to write another long report about how you died twice in completely different situations, and I'm having enough trouble with Shigure. I prefer to take you to Reikai with me and fix things my way."

Hiei's eyes narrowed ominously. So did Mukuro's. "Koenma-chan, I'm being awfully condescending to you, since it's obvious that you're not yet mature to learn the basics of interworld diplomacy," she spat. "But let me teach you this: threatening my heir, in my presence, while standing in my private chambers, might not be the brightest idea. Thanks to Urameshi a war between the Makai kingdoms was avoided. But rest assured that I still can get my people ready for another war in no time."

Koenma faced her glare with equal haughtiness. Hiei's chin dropped. An interworld war? Because of me?

The comm on the bedside table interrupted the argument with a loud urgent beep. But this time it wasn't the orange button flashing on the machine's dial. It was the green one.

The alarm signaled a break-in.

Hiei got on his feet in a blurry movement. "More uninvited guests?" he groaned.

"Or one of the same stepping where he shouldn't," Mukuro suggested, not taking her eyes from Koenma. "You better go check, Hiei. Koenma-chan and I have business to discuss."

The Fire Demon was more than happy to leave that absurd quarreling behind. Of course, it meant leaving to Mukuro the task of protecting his interests ¾ namely, his right to live. He still wasn't used to the idea of having someone else handling his problems... but taking care of each other was one of the tacit clauses involved in his association with her. With a nod and an imperceptible smile towards his boss and lover, he grabbed his shirt and katana and left the room.

"If this is just a pretext to give him the chance to run away..." Koenma grimaced.

Mukuro's snort was a perfect copy of the Jaganshi's. "Don't worry, Koenma-chan. Hiei knows that if there's one place in the three worlds where he's safe, that place is right here."

~*~

While his human body faced the teen years, Kurama did his best to act as a normal human teenager. But only when his mother remarried and he had the chance to watch closely the behavior of his young stepbrother did Kurama understand what a pitiful act he had made. Little Shuuichi was lively and emotional, and his mood had only two phases: deliriously happy or miserably depressed. He would praise the wonders of life because of a joyful victory from his school's baseball team, and curse the cruel fate his life was condemned to follow when his father forbade him from camping with his friends.

Only by the close contact with the boy had Kurama learned the essence of the teen years: each event had inescapable consequences that would endure forever. Not camping with his friends that weekend meant his social life was ruined for good. That was how little Shuuichi saw things, at least.

By personal experience, Kurama knew that few decisions he could make had alarming consequences that would endure more than a decade or two ¾ a ludicrous amount of time to a spirit his age. Poor Shiori, used to her son's mature, detached ways, was left benumbed by the stepson who would run up the stairs in fury and bang the door of his bedroom shut whenever he was upset. Kurama never managed to fake that kind of raging emotion in front of her.

But now...

The ki aura had finally vanished completely. Whatever he had done to mask his emotions from others and from himself, he had stopped doing it. He was deeply exhausted, with not enough ki left to summon a simple rose.

And what he wanted the most now was to run up the stairs of his home in Tokyo, lock himself in his room and hide his head under the pillow.

In Mukuro's fortress, he did the best he could. With some effort he found a dark empty corner in a large room filled with strange machinery. Between a column and a large window with dark bluish glass, Kurama hid his tormented demeanor, pacing nervously, his head aching terribly. His eyes stung and his throat was sore with a scream he refused to let go. "Inari... please help me..."

Never in his life Kurama had felt so close of losing his mind. His legs begged for rest, but he couldn't stop moving, afraid that more frightening revelations would pop up to haunt him if he stopped. "I can't deal with this..."

There wasn't any escape though. He had to try either digest the new information about his self, or scrutinize his feelings about what Hiei had done. Without enough ki to prevent it, his brain would start analyzing those issues, no matter how painful both were.

Shivering inside, he chose Hiei. At least there was some familiarity in that subject.

So... he sighed. Hiei killed himself.

It didn't seem plausible somehow, and Kurama wondered vaguely if the youkai had bribed someone to tamper with his file again.

But it still felt typical of him in a way.

That reasoning wasn't helping any in relieving Kurama's headache. Great... an unexpected act that was too predictable. I'm sure next time I see Yusuke, he will have turned into a frog... After trusting his brains and logic all his life, the Youko felt utterly helpless. Score: Kaganae-sensei two, Youko Kurama nothing...

"Guys... I think... I think Hiei is dead." Kuwabara's words had been the trigger to the deep denial stasis that depleted all his strength. I was waiting for the words, Kurama realized all of a sudden. He tried to tell me the day I went back to Ningenkai, but I cut him off. And I cut him off because I knew what he was going to tell me and I didn't want to listen.

It was, to say the least, an awfully selfish thing to do. Eager to sever his ties with the Demon World ¾ and particularly with Hiei ¾ he had denied the Fire Demon a chance to open up. But what chance did he give me? All those accusations and superior looks... He never even tried to understand my decision!

And at that point, Hiei had already made the stupidity and Mukuro had already corrected that stupidity, so there was really nothing Kurama could have done. Maybe patted him on the back for friendly comfort, or punched his stomach as Kuwabara suggested... and then gone back to Ningenkai, to his mother, his home and the life he chose. He wouldn't have let the youkai blackmail him to stay with a suicide story.

Not that Hiei is the kind of guy to do that... Left to face himself without any magical makeup, Kurama had to be honest with himself and admit that Hiei never asked him to stay in the Makai with him. He had criticized and derided his decision, but never asked him to change it.

"Then why the hell did he do it?" he hissed, gazing out a circular window and contemplating the majestic storm outside. Yusuke was right, Hiei could fall but never bend; that was the image he had projected since the first time they met, both in Ningenkai and... "back then". Step into a fight and not give all of himself? Run against a swordsman as skilful as Shigure and hold his Fire powers back? Surrender? How could he do such a thing? Why would he seek such a meaningless death?

Kurama halted his nervous pacing at last, resting his hands on the thick glass for support. I left him alone. Whatever it was that he was facing, I left him alone.

"You're trying to be loyal to too many people... and you're lying to all of us," Hiei had accused him after their first night together. "Soon you're gonna start betraying those people, and I'm very sure your first choice will be me."

But what could Kurama have done? To keep on with a relationship he didn't really want and didn't know what to do about? Since Hiei was the only one he felt completely at ease to be with, what use there would be in keeping on lying at him? Kurama wore so many masks already... And I couldn't know what he was going to do... I never thought he was the suicidal type...

If he had any expendable ki left, his aura would have flared at that thought and he knew it. One of the first things that Hiei ever told him was that he was the suicidal type. "Twas on my neck before," baby Hiei had told him, looking down at the leash attached to his ankles. "They changed so I don't die."

Less than two years old, and Hiei had already tried to hang himself.

But Youko Kurama couldn't have acted as a babysitter then, and the same went to Shuuichi Minamino three years ago. Wasn't that the point of renouncing to any revenge? Because no matter how mean Kurama had been, that had taught Hiei to be the survivor he prided to be? Where was the fucking survivor now? How could he do this to me?

"Fox?"

Kurama was startled by the sudden call, but kept himself frozen in place. I wanna punch him. I wanna strangle him. I wanna kick his ass out of my life forever. "Leave me alone, Hiei."

"This is one of Mukuro's private labs, you set out the alarm when you came in." The youkai's tone was of sheer puzzlement. The elusive Youko Kurama setting off an alarm?

"I'm not stealing, Hiei," Kurama sighed, his anger barely camouflaged in his voice. "Don't need to worry, I want nothing that belongs to her." He shoved his hands in his pockets, well aware of how conspicuously they were shaking.

The reply took a moment to come. "Are you okay?" Hiei's tone was low, concerned. Frank. It drove the Youko even angrier.

"Buzz off!" Kurama snapped.

"What's wrong with you? You look ill..."

"I'm not ill."

"You're pale and trembling, your ki level is even lower than mine right now," said the Jaganshi, stepping beside the Youko. "I used the Kokuryuuha a few hours ago. What's your excuse?"

Kurama chuckled humorlessly. "Why do I need an excuse? My health doesn't concern you. Nothing about me concerns you." He didn't mind if this sounded ridiculously bitter, he didn't mind if he was making a petty fool of himself. His chest hurt, his head throbbed, his feet were about to give way. To hell with self-control! Let's just see how pathetic I am without this power manipulating my mind and mood, and making me look cool...

"Does my health concerns you then?" the youkai retorted.

Kurama felt dizzy with the subtle change of topic. "What?"

"Why did you come here, Fox?"

"Don't call me that!!!"

Hiei sighed, but didn't argue. "Why did you come?"

"Yusuke dragged me here."

"Oh."

"Oh?" What is that supposed to mean? Was he disappointed? Relieved? Kurama couldn't tell.

"So you don't care after all..." Hiei snorted with a strange smile.

"About you?" Do I know that?

"About the death of a Forbidden Child."

The memory slapped Kurama's mind with the strength of the anger he felt in his heart now.

~*~

The door was rectangular, symmetric, normal. It looked almost stunning in a house made of bent walls and filled with the most unusually shaped furniture. It looked... inviting.

Which could be a definitive sign of a trap, in a place like the Yojigen Mansion. Even knowing that it had been Genkai behind Yusuke's kidnapping, Kurama still decided to be careful with his wanderings throughout the surrealistic house.

Kurama opened the door cautiously, half-expecting to fall inside a Salvador Dali landscape, hoping for a comfortable spot to sleep. Genkai had a suite for herself ready, and Botan had declined Kuwabara's invitation to serve as his pillow and chose a lounge in the shihan's room. Kido, Kaitou and Yanagisawa had their rooms arranged too; Yusuke and Kuwabara had picked some futons and made themselves comfortable in the atelier.

But the Youko wanted to be by himself. The presence of a tunnel to Makai nearby was a troubling thought, and he wanted some quietude to ponder about the risks and possibilities involved. Besides, he couldn't stand Kuwabara's snoring.

Kurama almost got what he wanted. The room before him was indeed puzzling, seeming slightly out of proportion somehow, but it looked friendly enough and ¾ the most important ¾ there was a large puffy couch right in the center, surrounded by a poetic moonbeam coming from the skylight.

However, the couch was already taken. And judging from the total lack of clothes covering the figure lying languidly on the cushions, Kurama wouldn't have much of a chance to be alone that night. "What if Kuwabara had chosen this room?"

Stretching on the couch, Hiei shrugged. "I can dress up and vanish in less than a second. Wanna see it?"

Kurama sighed, gazing tenderly at each wrinkle of the pale skin under the moonlight. "Not now."

The youkai smirked, stretching lazily. "You're just gonna stay there staring at me?"

The redhead didn't need more encouragement. The next second he was lying on his friend's naked body, cozily wrapped in one of his inimitable hugs. "Is this what you had in mind?"

Hiei rested his lips on Kurama's, devouring the Youko with the eyes. "You're learning, Fox."

"You look so surprised," Hiei commented.

The redhead wouldn't reveal his real intentions though. "I thought you were gone."

"To all practical purposes, I am."

"Or standing in your way," Hiei completed. "I meant it."

"You're in my way to bed," the redhead pointed out with an impish wink.

"But I'm not standing."

And some people thought Hiei didn't have a sense of humor. Before Kurama had a chance to laugh though, the youkai emphasized his not-standing position by twirling his legs around the Youko's, caressing him all over. "Can you feel it?"

"Yeah, baby..."

A pinch on Kurama's buttocks.

"Ouch!"

"Stupid Fox, I mean the evil energy in the air."

"Oh... that." Why did the laconic Hiei always want to talk when Kurama had the least interest in chatting?

But the vague demonic presence had been bothering him for some days already. And that Makai insect he had found landed unconcernedly on the shoulder of one of his classmates had now an explanation. The Ningenkai was being bathed by Makai air. "Yes," he whispered, brushing his tongue on his friend's earlobe. "Must be coming from the tunnel..."

"It's calling me back, Fox."

Kurama closed his eyes, wishing he hadn't heard that. Hiei had never hidden his intentions of going back to their homeworld as soon as he found a way of getting Koenma off his back. Which hadn't seemed very likely anytime soon, considering the bulk of criminal accusations pending over the Fire Demon.

"I'm pretty sure about not wanting to stay here. I'm free of my damned parole, Yukina is safe... There's nothing binding me to this world anymore."

The Youko was measuring the Fire Demon's sexy body up and down, longingly licking his lips. "Nothing at all, baby?" he murmured.

Hiei caressed the beautiful red mane, smiling softly. "All you need is a whore with lots of stamina, Fox. And all I need is a bed of my own."

The youkai shrugged. "I don't know. Ask me again when I earn my bed."

But this was a Forbidden Child he was talking to. To the Youko's exasperation, Hiei seemed to think that he had to prove himself worthy of everything in his life: a lover, a toothbrush, one day more of survival, anything. And Kurama not-so-secretly thought that the little half-koorime was a biased and unyielding judge of himself too.

Hiei's fingers slid down to caress his neck and shoulders, blurring Kurama's introspection. The Fire Demon's touch was quite unique, thrilling and unpredictable, getting responses the Youko couldn't either control or describe. After the first few times, in which Hiei would constantly surprise him by putting him in awkward, harrowing and delightful situations, Kurama had learned to relax and let the short youkai play with his body at will. He grunted his annoyance for good measure, but over and above he just enjoyed the flight.

At any rate, the Youko wasn't ready to renounce the erotic games and heartbreaking hugs. "There'll be other opportunities to go back to Makai," he whispered in Hiei's ears, letting his hands travel happily towards his friend's firm hips. "You don't have to leave now. I could convince you to stay, you know."

But to Hiei the matter shouldn't be taken as lightly as that. "You heard Koenma. I'm a lower B-class youkai already. Too strong to go back to Makai in one of the natural portals I used to come here. This new tunnel is my best chance... but if I wait and my powers get stronger, I might not be able to pass through the barrier. I can't miss this opening."

Kurama had been trying not to think of that. That math easily applied to him too. He had made his decision about it some time ago, but now that decision might finally become irreversible. "Baby... Yusuke will do all he can to keep this tunnel from being finished."

"And you'll be helping him." Not a question.

The redhead rested his cheek on Hiei's shoulder. "Yes."

"Somehow I don't think that'll be too easy. Koenma is hiding something from us."

Hiei snorted, shifting under the Youko's body to better accommodate them both. "So typical of him, sending his Tantei in a mission and keeping sensitive information from them."

Kurama shrugged. "What else would you expect from a Reikai Prince, baby?"

"Nothing. It just bothers me to see that Yusuke trusts him so much."

"He trusts the brat, me and you," Hiei added. "Three huge mistakes. Too many have died for a lot less."

Huffing his discontentment, Kurama bit Hiei's nipple. That strange implication again. "You still think I'm gonna stab your back and the others' someday?"

The youkai visibly pondered the question for a moment before replying, "You might find a way of sparing Yusuke."

There wasn't any jealousy in Hiei's thoughtful tone. "Why do you say so?"

That deserved another moment of careful pondering. "Betraying Yusuke would ruin your self-image. You'll hate yourself if you find out you can do it."

Kurama just glowered down at him and attacked the other nipple. The conversation was threatening to ruin his sexy appetite. "You're so tasty..."

Hiei got the hint and fell silent, returning his attention to the Youko's soft skin. Catching one of Kurama's hands, he demonstrated how his tongue was narrower and nimbler than a ningen's, licking with precision every line and wrinkle of the palm, then dancing in between the fingers. The redhead moaned a curse against alluring youkais with treacherous tongues and moved down to take revenge on the Fire Demon's bellybutton.

However, the damage had been done already. As hard as Kurama tried to focus his mind in making his lover pay for being so damned delicious, Hiei's voice kept drilling his ears, not with the sighs and wails he wanted to hear from him, but with painful words of a not so distant past.

He closed his eyes, fighting the words and the jabs of guilt hitting his chest, filling his mind with the image of Hiei's naked body beneath him...

...and got the memory of a tall silver Youko fondling the groin of a two year-old baby demon.

"Fox...?" Hiei called, confused.

"I did something wrong?" the Jaganshi asked apologetically, his uncertainty explicit in his manners. He held the Youko loosely, granting him the choice of parting the hug whenever he wanted.

But Kurama only tightened it more, nearly crushing the diminutive youkai's ribs. "I don't want you to go," he confessed in a shaky whisper.

Hiei's bones solidified instantly. "Fox..." There was a clear admonition in his tone. Their relationship didn't entitle the Youko to make any demands.

Kurama cringed, both at the sudden strain in his friend's body and the dangerous field he was taking the conversation to. "Baby... you know I can't leave Ningenkai."

"Hn. I know you won't," Hiei corrected him with a slight frown.

Kurama ignored it. "You'd be on your own."

"And that never happened before," the youkai replied sarcastically.

"I'm serious, Hiei. It's a dangerous world, where you have to fight for your life almost every day..."

"Almost?" Hiei snickered. "You were lucky, Fox."

"...and I won't be there to watch your back," Kurama concluded, running a fingertip along Hiei's arched eyebrows.

"I hate to insult your pride, Fox," the youkai yawned, "but I'll manage. I lived most of my life without any partners. Besides, I'm a lot stronger now."

"Yet you still let a human like Kaitou capture your spirit," the redhead reminded him, wincing at the ill-tempered retort he would certainly get for mentioning the subject.

Hiei scowled, his eyes darkened. Thankfully that was all. "So?"

Hiei rolled his eyes. "If you're expecting me to thank you, I'm not going to. My fate is none of your business."

Kurama pulled the white hairs on the youkai's head reproachfully. "Don't you understand you could have died?!"

Ruby eyes scanned the Youko's green ones in hungry curiosity, and Kurama gulped at the uncomfortable sensation of baring his soul before the Jaganshi. A little frown... one eyebrow curving and disappearing under the bandanna... then a shy chuckle... until the Fire Demon exploded in a rich laughter.

The youkai pulled him closer, embracing him warmly and bringing his lips down to a sweet, almost chaste kiss. "Only you..." Hiei whispered, his tone still wrapped in laughter, caressing his friend's face with awe and tenderness. "Only you to care about the death of a Forbidden Child, Fox. Most people wouldn't even bother to dig a hole to bury me."

~*~

And then I embraced him again... as tight as I could...

Kurama closed his eyes, leaned his forehead against the window's glass. "I care," he murmured. He never thought it would be so hard to say just two short words. As soon as they were out of his mouth, the redhead wished a lightening would strike him dead.

"Fox..." Hiei stepped closer, his voice mixing surprise, affection and concern.

But as he felt the Fire Demon's warmth approaching, Kurama stiffened and raised his head proudly. "Don't call me that. I mean it now. The time for games is over."

"I'm not playing any games. It's you who are pretending to be fine when you obviously aren't. It's you who came here and insist you didn't want to be here. No one ever forces you, no one has that power over you but yourself. This isn't the first time you've blamed Yusuke for your choices, remember?"

Kurama felt a pang incinerating his heart. After Sensui's death... of course he could have made Puu ¾ and hence Yusuke ¾ leave Hiei back in Makai. But with an unconscious power to manipulate the field of reality around him, it had been ridiculously easy to convince himself that it hadn't been his choice. Please help me, Inari... What have I been doing with my life?

"I tried to tell you," the youkai sighed, sounding gentler this time. "I thought it wouldn't be right not to tell you. And... I really wanted to tell you."

For the Jaganshi, that was an embarrassing admission of vulnerability. The Youko couldn't help wincing, knowing how much it was costing his friend.

"You used to ask me lots of things about my life and what I think," Hiei continued, his embarrassment turning into honest bewilderment. "I don't understand why. And I can't understand why you care. But I thought you'd want to know about that too."

"I don't," Kurama cut him off. He wasn't in any condition to listen to someone else's problems. Before taking lots of painkillers and sleeping for a hundred hours, he wouldn't be in any condition to listen to anyone's problems, including his own.

"Then what do you want from me, Fo... Kurama?" Hiei demanded impatiently, swallowing the endearment with obvious difficulty.

What do I want? Kurama measured him with his eyes, while measuring his own feelings in the back of his mind. Where before lay a solid and barren layer of ice, now the wrath of a cataclysmic nature charred his heart and shook every nerve in his body. He wanted to maul Hiei senseless, fuck him silly and kiss him madly, preferably in that very order. "I want nothing from you."

"So why do you look at me like that?"

"Like what?"

Hiei's lips curved slightly, in a sad smile. "Like you're about to devour me alive and gnaw the bones?"

Kurama's heart pounded heavily in his chest. Oh damn you, Jaganshi! "Don't overestimate yourself."

The youkai leaned back against the wall beside the window. "I didn't mean it that way, actually."

"Whatever," the redhead grunted. "You're with Mukuro now."

"Yes. I told you before you left, remember?"

Of course Kurama remembered. He remembered their goodbye too well. "I mean, you're still with her."

"Yes."

"Is it serious?"

Hiei chuckled. "How you define "serious"?"

The redhead cursed under his breath when he realized how human-based his question had been. "Is there a commitment?"

The Jaganshi appeared to be amused with the conversation ¾ which seemed rather unusual to Kurama. Discussing relationships wasn't something the Hiei he knew would be eager to do. "There are lots of commitments between Mukuro and me. And there were none between us when we were together. Does that answer your question?"

No. "Yes," Kurama muttered.

"Then I really don't understand you," Hiei shook his head. "What answer do you get from a question like that?"

Not much, the Youko admitted. Not considering all the circumstances. I never asked or offered commitment. Mukuro obviously did. And there are all kinds of commitments anyway.

"You're not with Yomi anymore," said Hiei. It wasn't a question. Mukuro obviously had spies on Gandara who would inform her and her heir if Youko Kurama had showed up for a visit.

"I have a commitment with Ningenkai and my mother," Kurama stated. "Makai is history for me, as is everything that lives here."

"And yet you're here now."

"I told you. I did it for Yusuke."

"Who's a demon of the Makai, by the way."

"Who lives in Ningenkai, by the way," the Youko spat. "Who's about to marry a human girl. Who decided to live as a ningen, just like I did. By the way."

"He won't stay in Ningenkai forever. And even if he's there for now, he told me about his plans of being here for the next Tournament in a year and half. What if he wins?"

Kurama rolled his eyes. "He won't win."

"Probably not," the Jaganshi shrugged. "But Yusuke doesn't realize that. And he knows that if he wins, that means three years ruling Makai. Three years living here."

A possibility Keiko would hardly approve. "You know Yusuke, he probably didn't even stop to think about that. But that's Yusuke's problem anyway. I won't take part in the next Tournament." He had to participate in the first, in order to corner Yomi so he would be forced to give up on the war. Now that this matter was over, so was his role in Makai politics.

"Let's just hope he doesn't drag you to do things you don't want to again..." Hiei grinned saucily.

Running out of patience, Kurama grabbed Hiei's arm, his nails delving in the youkai's flesh. "What do you want me to say? So I care. I came here because of you. Because I wanted to. And now I want to chop you into pieces and feed you to my plants. Are you satisfied?"

"No," Hiei replied softly. "This is not about me, I know. It never was. You just miss the freedom you had here in our world. Here you can follow your instincts and your race code, and be as untamable as your reputation claims you are."

"Why do you keep returning to this over and over again?" Kurama protested tiredly. "I made my choice. I am human now." And I'm fine and happy with it.

"That is just as stupid as if I decided to be a true Koorime from now on..." Hiei muttered.

"One thing has nothing to do with the other. Look at me. I am human, by birth. And now, by will."

"Your garden must be a mess then."

Kurama stiffened.

"Isn't it?" Hiei teased. "Come on, those plants always breathed in your youki, they fed from your aura. Now that you decided so positively that you're a human and will live on without your Youko aspect and powers, most of them must have withered, or at least weakened."

Kurama glared at the Fire Demon, who smirked sarcastically in reply.

"Not to mention, your mother," Hiei continued, "with those headaches she has from time to time. How is she doing without your special teas?"

"Shut up, Hiei," the redhead hissed.

"Strange, on my way here I saw some of the guards passing ointment over some gashes on their limbs," the youkai faked a frown. "I was sure that they had been hit by your Fuuka Enbujin when you, Yusuke and Kuwabara made your entrance. My mistake, I guess."

Kurama turned his back at him, focusing on the window again. No, of course he hadn't given up of all his powers. That wasn't the point. He could live as a human and keep some of his talents, couldn't he? Just like Kuwabara.

A gentle hand stroked his red mane, close to his nape. "You don't carry seeds in your hair anymore, do you, Fox?"

Kurama wanted to slap that hand away, slap the youkai away, light-years away. Inari, what's going on with me? Why do I let him humiliate me like this? He didn't move though. "I told you not to call me that."

To Kurama's surprise, Hiei withdrew the hand, stepping away, and nodded to the correction. "Kurama."

The Youko stared at the little demon's reflection on the window's glass, suddenly noticing the tautness on his neck and shoulders, and the opaqueness in his ruby eyes. He doesn't have the reins of this game either, Kurama realized. He's just beating around the bush. Ironically, Hiei had managed to hit his tail a dozen times already, willingly or not. "Why can't you accept my decision?"

"Why are you so mad at mine?" the youkai riposted.

"Killing yourself is not much of a decision!"

"To your thinking," Hiei added, then shrugged. "Anyway, you were already mad at me when you went back to the Human World and I told you I was going to stay in Makai."

Kurama shook his head, trying hard to calm down and infuse some logic in his thoughts. Hiei could infuriate him like no other. "I wasn't mad."

Hiei snorted. "You called me a coward and a traitor."

The redhead pursed his lips. Okay, so maybe I was a little mad.

"Why?" the youkai inquired. "My decision had nothing to do with you."

Of course not, Kurama mused, absolutely exhausted. That's why I was so mad... It was hard to admit, but he had been quarreling with the same enigma for more than three years now. I told him to leave. He doesn't fit in my life in Ningenkai. He doesn't fit the pattern of lovers or partners I had as a Youko in the past. He doesn't fit anywhere around me, no matter which lifestyle I choose, and he doesn't want to fit. Should have been the easiest decision I ever made!

"Kurama, you're not well," Hiei whispered, tentatively holding the Youko's arms. "I'm sorry."

Kurama gazed at him in awe, astonished at the concern darkening those crimson eyes. Did he just apologize to me?

Grateful for not being shooed away again, the Fire Demon smiled bashfully. "I once accused you of getting away from my accusations by accusing me first. I'm not doing any better now."

The redhead closed his eyes tight, inexplicable tears stinging under the eyelids. His hands moved automatically to Hiei's small shoulders; the room began to spin around him. "I'm gonna kill you. You'll wish Mukuro had never brought you back."

"It wouldn't be much of a fight, at our present condition," Hiei chuckled, helping his friend to sit on the floor, the back against the wall. Thankfully, Kurama didn't resist. "I'd summon a tiny flame to burn your toes, and you could throw a seed in my eye, and then we'd both collapse. The public roars "Korose!" and Koto starts counting and Yusuke jumps in the battlefield and kicks our asses for disgracing the Urameshi Team's reputation. No thanks."

"Oh shut up," Kurama moaned, wiping his eyes. "I won't let you make me laugh."

Hiei sat beside him, not touching. "Can you tell me what's wrong with you? And don't tell me it's nothing."

The Youko sighed. "I'm having a bit of a problem with my powers. It's too hard to explain."

"But you're gonna be okay?"

It was so unfair. How could Kurama hate someone who looked up at him with so much worry and affection in his eyes? "Yes. I think so." He hoped so.

The youkai nodded and turned his eyes to the ground, relieving his friend from the pressure of his gaze. Gradually, the room slowed down its spinning, and Kurama felt easier to breathe. It would have been so good to slip down and rest his head on Hiei's lap and take a nap, having his hair caressed by warm chubby fingers... "Why, Hiei?" he inquired in a low hoarse voice.

Hiei hugged his knees, staring blankly ahead. He didn't have to ask what that question was about. "It seemed so... proper," the youkai whispered.

The Youko gasped. Out of all possible absurd explanations... "Proper?!"

"Remember those movies you took me to watch in Ningenkai?"

The redhead nodded, puzzled. He had taken Hiei to the movies several times, trying to instill some of the human manners and customs on him, so he wouldn't stick out in a crowd as a flamingo in a party of canaries. It never quite worked. But I was careful. I never took him to those depressive dramas, I knew they would make him bluer than he usually is already.

"All those movies," Hiei explained, "I could tell they were going to end five minutes before they did."

Kurama frowned. Okay, so I probably took him to watch very predictable plots... Those were the safer ones.

"When I saw Shigure after all those years..." the youkai hissed. "I knew I was five minutes from the end of my story." Shigure had been the first chapter of a long, distressing, excruciating and mostly useless search for a sister he couldn't acknowledge, a home he didn't belong to and a life he didn't dare to dream about. When Mukuro brought Shigure to fight him, Hiei imagined that Fate was finally smiling at him, granting him a merciful epilogue. He should have died that day. It would have been perfect, symmetrical, and even poetic.

But that wasn't something he really expected Kurama to understand.

"The circle was complete," the Youko murmured with a troubling smile.

Hiei blinked, opening huge round eyes to the taller demon. "Yes."

The smile saddened, the emerald eyes glimmered behind unshed tears. "I keep forgetting how young you are."

Did he understand? Hiei just kept staring at the sorrowful green irises, perplexed and expectant.

"Do you have any idea of how many circles I saw completing on me in my entire life?" Kurama whispered tenderly.

The little half-koorime looked away. "It's not the same thing."

"Of course not," the redhead grinned. "Because it wasn't you. No matter how many times I cut my finger in a rose thorn, you'll still have to cut your own to learn that it bleeds. And I could tell you it will heal afterwards, but why would you listen to me? What does a senile fox like me know about your life?"

"You're not senile, Fox," Hiei murmured shyly.

Kurama breathed in deeply, his chest mysteriously free of most of its stress. "Thanks, baby."

Perhaps it was time to get Hiei to rest his head on the Youko's lap and stroke his sable hair with slender fingers... but Kurama found himself unable to offer his former lover any solace. The previous accusations still ruffled his fur, he still had to digest that suicide thing better... and moreover he had to take lots of painkillers and sleep for a hundred hours, and regain control of himself. The Fire Demon's hugs were too dangerous. With the two of them about to break down with fatigue and frustration, it would be just like the end of the Ankoku Bujutsukai all over again.

From the window above their heads, a bluish flare lit the room. For a brief instant Kurama imagined the storm had drawn near the fortress, until a familiar sensation brushed his weary mind, freezing the blood in his veins. He glanced at Hiei and saw him shudder, aware of the demonic presence powering up outside, just eighty yards away.

Toushin Yusuke.

"Why is he taking this so hard?" Hiei mumbled nervously.

The redhead twitched his lips. Does he honestly think I'm the only one who cares? "I guess you'll have to go down there and ask him."

The youkai didn't move. Kurama could almost see his fast heartbeat pulsing in his eyes. "I hope you can do better than summon a tiny flame to burn his toes."

"Just a little better," Hiei admitted bitterly. "Maybe I can set fire to his pants."

"Too bad I won't be there to see it." Kurama was more than a bit surprised. He fully comprehended Yusuke's fury, but he would have betted that their reckless teamleader would wait until the next day, when Hiei would be strong enough to fight with his full force and skill. And he'd also have betted that within a few hours Urameshi's temper would cool off and the physical fight would be avoided altogether. I suppose Hiei wasn't the only one to underestimate Yusuke's feelings...

The Jaganshi stood up, gathering courage to face this challenge. "Are you going to be okay?"

Kurama nodded. "Go. I'll be fine."

Hiei studied his friend's face for a moment, visibly mistrusting the reassuring words. Then he sighed and moved to the lab's door. He paused there, before exiting. "Maybe we can continue this talk later," he suggested timidly.

Once again the Youko felt divided between hugging him and smashing his head with a hammer. Which part of this dreadful talk does he want to continue? But once more he just nodded.

Fortunately, that next conversation would also be the last. After that, Kurama would go back to his fine and happy life in Ningenkai, and with any luck they would never get to see each other again.

~*~

To Hiei's disappointment, Toushin Yusuke's hair hadn't grown to the savage long chestnut mane he had seen during the combat against Sensui. The body marks were all there, frightening and beautiful, and the eyes glowed yellow. But the hair remained short and pasted to Yusuke's head with that sticky gel he used.

It was a disconcerting image for the Fire Demon. As if he were facing a wild beast wearing spectacles.

"I don't like this kind of fight," Yusuke snarled in a husky tone. "It feels wrong to run against a respectable adversary when he can't give the best of himself." The words echoed within the ring of stones that circled the dale Yusuke had chosen to be their battlefield. "But you know what? I don't respect you that much. Not anymore."

"Some people might suggest you were afraid of facing the Kokuryuuha," Hiei grinned tightly.

"I don't give a damn to what people say! You're still nothing but a cockroach!"

Hiei's body was shaken by a deep tremor, as if hit by a lightening.

"Besides, what's the point of waiting?" Yusuke proceeded, the wrath gleam in his eyes reaching astounding proportions. "You're gonna bow out anyway."

"Maybe I won't."

Hiei could taste the venom in Yusuke's lopsided smile. "Only one way to find out, Jaganshi."

Urameshi's aura ignited in a choleric wave of piercing youki, eclipsing the thunderstorm in the red skies and ramming Hiei back, his boots drawing trails on the ground as he tried to keep standing. Jounced by that awesome force, the stones around them revealed thin cracks all over their surface, and Hiei distantly pondered that Mukuro would be very upset about that. The Itabasami Ring was one her favorite spots in her territory, one of the reasons she had installed her fortress in the area. I hope I can at least drive this battle away from here. She'll be mad enough at me for dying again.

Because, in his present situation, there wasn't much he could do. He summoned his ki to clash with Yusuke's, but what he got was only enough not to be shoved back anymore; he managed to stick his feet firmly on the soil, and that was all the resistance he could offer now.

With Shigure he had had a choice. Now, there was no way out.

And this time Mukuro wouldn't be able to help it.

~*~

April 6th, 2001