Embracing a Knife of Ice
by Morgan D.

There were four splits in the gypsum of the ceiling of Kurama's bathroom, and together the lines vaguely formed the picture of an old woman with very large feet.

Hiei snorted. His mind was definitely going adrift now, which probably meant Kurama's fun was finally about to end.

However, the pressure of the Youko's mouth around his girth still sent electric bolts up his spine, even if the subject of such an elating wet caress, after countless hours being offered the redhead's devoted attention, felt more than a little numb. Actually most of Hiei's muscles were now either sore or numb, but still the wooshing sensations were all there, gagging whatever pleas to stop his weary mind could come up with.

Back in Makai he had heard many anecdotes about the insatiable libido and stamina of the youkos. He now sent mental apologies to the taletellers for having doubted them; tonight - although it was still early in the afternoon when they had started - he had experienced first hand how absurdly enduring a Youko's arousal could be.

Kurama paused to look up at Hiei's strained face with an alluring smile. "Ready for it?"

The youkai moaned, trying to relax on the cold glazed tiles of the floor. He didn't even bother giving an intelligible answer anymore. He was ready to collapse and sleep for a week, but he knew better than to mention it to the Youko. He wasn't sure if Kurama would accept to stop if he asked, and at this point either continuing or stopping would be a torture. He just hoped that his loving torturer would spare him from the acrobatics this time, since he hadn't been able to move his hips for the last two hours.

Mercifully, Kurama didn't exact any effort from him, just moving to straddle the small muscular body, rubbing his butt enticingly against Hiei's shaft.

The youkai delved his fangs in his lower lip. No matter how tired he was, his mind insisted on hazing over in mesmerized delight every time the redhead shifted to attack him from a different angle. Shimatta, he's a fast learner...

Despite the legendary reputation of the fox-demons, Hiei hadn't thought much of Kurama's sexy talents that first attempt on the kitchen table. Rough, hasty, predictable, just like the others, expecting him to be horny and begging just for having his cock rubbed and squeezed. Hn.

Okay, so he would have gotten aroused eventually, he always did. By then Kurama would be done with him, and Hiei would have to finish it for himself, as usual. But when the redhead started to delay his own release, Hiei wondered why. Perhaps the Youko wanted to be the bottom; it was the only reason he could think of. That was unusual, but not unprecedented.

However... something really weird happened. Kurama stopped. He really wanted Hiei to be horny and begging, or else the game was over.

The Jaganshi didn't know what to make of it, and his first reaction was deep annoyance. It was one of the reasons he refrained from giving in to his hormones too often: lovers were invariably so demanding and stupid! He was always half-expecting them to come to him and yell, "Hey you! Get your prick up!" If Kurama had said something of the sort, Hiei would have passed his katana through that beautiful red hair of his without any regret.

But Kurama said nothing of the sort. On the contrary, he seemed actually hurt, confused, ashamed. As if he had failed in getting Hiei aroused.

So Hiei taught him what to do. That had been so hard, the words wouldn't come out. He simply couldn't picture himself saying, "Please, do this and that to me;" it was embarrassing, and forbidden somehow. As if the skies would be ripped apart and a storm of lava would fall over the town if he asked someone to touch him. Fortunately, the Youko was very clever and the two of them had always shared a subtle plane of communication; Kurama got the message in time to avoid both the carnage in Tokyo and the youkai's deep abashment.

About the third or fourth round, Kurama had almost mastered the new techniques completely. Still his hastiness got in the way from time to time; that or the difference in height between them. Otherwise, the redhead was perfect. Why the stupid Fox wasted his time giving him pleasure was still a mystery. But for once Hiei could live quite agreeably with one of Kurama's inexplicable attitudes.

The Youko was good, and instead of getting tired, he got better and more enthusiastic every time. On the other hand, Hiei was exhausted, his body didn't obey him anymore, but he couldn't make himself to tell his partner to stop. Even if his own skin felt like dead rubber to him, Kurama's skin against his whipped him with flaming daggers and soothing silk.

The Youko slid down on him easily, with none of the stress of their first attempts. Hiei curved his neck to watch his shaft vanishing inside Kurama, warmly enveloped by the velvety compression that sent spasms through his overloaded nerves. The sensation was too weird. Pleasure and anxiety grew with every pumping move of the redhead's hips dancing above him, but it was almost as if it was someone else's pleasure reaching him through distant telepathic transmissions. He whimpered, knowing that at that pace he would take a lifetime to climax. He didn't think the Youko was that insatiable.

He reached out to fondle Kurama's chest, remembering the sweet moans he had extracted from his friend simply by brushing the end of the soft red tresses against his own nipples in one of their first times. Now he had to pinch them hard or rub them with his callused hands rudely to get any reaction. At least I know he's finally getting numb with this too, Hiei mused.

Kurama leaned forward, making it easier for Hiei to touch him. "You're delicious..." he licked his lips.

Looking at Hiei with a predator stare. "Like roasted rabbit?" the youkai murmured, surprised that his voice still worked, if barely.

"Like chocolate mousse," Kurama corrected, doubling the vigor with which he impaled himself on Hiei's prick. His voice didn't sound that clear either.

The Jaganshi grinned at the idea of being compared to something so soft and sweet. He wondered if the Youko was so absorbed in his own bliss that he had forgotten whom he was doing it with. Sliding his hands down, he stroked Kurama's waist and thighs, reaching the knees, then scraping the fingernails on the pale skin in the way back to the crotch. You think this soft and sweet? he sniffed disdainfully.

"H-h-hiei..." the redhead hissed. Maybe not soft. But the ecstatic response distinctly hinted 'sweet'. "Please... make me come."

The youkai cringed. His arms were heavier than two gigantic anchors... "You seem to be doing a... ahhh..." He faltered at a stronger thrust. "...a good job yourself..."

Kurama tried to shake his head in denial, the movement turning out confused in the attempt of synchronizing it with the pumping dance. "Need your help..."

That was not fair. Hiei was too exhausted to act as little more than a dildo. And too exhausted to feel much more than a dildo did. "I hate you," he told Kurama, at that moment being as truthful as he could ever be.

"Thanks," the Youko replied. "Now... please... don't make me beg..."

Hiei loved making him beg. And he would now, if he still had any control of his neurons. However, his brain cells thought wiser to guide Hiei's fingers to hold Kurama's balls tight, grabbing the penis in an iron grasp. If he's as numb as I am, I'll have to smash him to make him come...

He feared to have exaggerated when the redhead groaned a hoarse wail, but his worries were soon discharged. "Harder... tighter..." the Youko pleaded.

Hiei made his best to strengthen the grip of his sore fingers, and massage the rigid member as fast and steady as possible. Kurama adjusted his pace to Hiei's, throwing his head back in doleful rapture.

For a while the youkai tried to measure what ached more, his wrists or the unfulfilled pressure in his crotch. Maybe he's not interested in my pleasure at all. Maybe this is just a sophisticated form of causing me pain... Yeah, that was probably it. Probably why Kurama now bent his head forward to gaze passionately at him again. That hurt more than anything.

"Inari..." the Youko panted. "I love this body..."

"Yours or mine?"

"... mine..."

Hiei would have rolled his eyes, if he didn't fear they could roll out of their sockets. "Thought so..."

Kurama closed his thighs around the youkai's hips, without losing the rhythm. Hiei whimpered, feeling his member being crushed inside the Youko, scoured mercilessly as Kurama moved up and down. He wanted to strangle the redhead for tormenting him like that. The youkai knew he wouldn't get anywhere near an orgasm until he had the chance to sleep for five or six days...

"Hiei... do that thing..."

Differently from the Fire Demon, Kurama had no trouble asking for specific caresses. "What thing?"

"...hmmmmm... with your... knees..."

Now that was abuse! "Can't move my legs, Kurama."

"Pleeeeeeeeaaase..."

Damn, the Fox was begging! And with puppy eyes, for all the beasts of hell. "Fuck you, Fox!"

"You're... already... doing it..."

"Asshole," the youkai muttered.

Green eyes glinted at him. "Exactly..."

Hiei promised himself that the next time they kissed he was going to bite the Youko's tongue off.

"Please, Hiei..."

Compressing his lips to muffle a groan of pain, the Jaganshi raised his legs and bent his knees, bringing them up to lean against Kurama's back. With the movement, Hiei's penis shifted angle inside the redhead's tight passage; a painfully delightful effect for both of them. Besides, they were more or less embracing each other with their legs, and the little demon positively loved that. If only his thighs didn't ache so much...

Kurama choked, his cheeks flushed, and he found himself unable to keep his eyes open anymore. Hiei recognized the signs, and happily tightened his grip around the Youko's cock, pumping it with more vigor.

Only a violent shiver signaled the Youko's climax, since his body - just as Hiei's - was too worn out to produce any sperm. For the last seven times they did it, orgasm hadn't been synonym for "release", but to "okay, this is as far as I can go without blowing a fuse." Inarticulate moans crammed the redhead's throat, as he lay down on the youkai's chest, breathless and soaked with sweat. Hiei shifted slightly so his still hard shaft would slide out from his friend's body.

"Wait..." Kurama murmured, panting. "Just a minute... I'll take care of you... in a minute..."

The small demon panicked. "Fox, I'm dead numb... you can tie my cock with your Rosewhip and I'll probably won't feel a thing..." He winced as soon as he finished the sentence, praying that he hadn't given the crazy Fox any nasty ideas.

"Trust me, Hiei..." the redhead whispered. "I'll make you feel reeeeeeaaally good..."

Hiei panicked even more. For one moment he thought Kurama would fall asleep right in the middle of that "reeeeeeaaally". If he decided to fall asleep right in the middle of taking care of him... the Jaganshi was frustrated enough already. "I can wait until tomorrow," he ventured. None of them had mentioned the possibility of a "tomorrow", and he hadn't intended to be the one bringing it up, but...

"Kaasan's coming home tomorrow."

That didn't clarify much, did it? "So?"

"You'd have to wait until she falls asleep."

That clarified a lot. So... there's going to be a tomorrow, Hiei mused, not sure if he was happy about it or scared to death. "I don't mind, Fox."

"I mind," Kurama said angrily. "And will you stop calling me that?"

"No."

"Great..." The Youko grabbed Hiei in his arms and hugged him forcefully. "You give the expression "pain in the ass" a whole new dimension, you little creep."

The Fire Demon sighed blithely, snuggling to the Youko's sweated body. "Glad to please your ass with my dimensions, Fox..."

Kurama laughed, licking the youkai's earlobe. "Next time I'm gonna gag you."

"Why? You're the big screamer!" Slowly, Hiei tangled his legs with Kurama's in that snakelike way of his, and sneaked his arms under the Youko's red mane, totally surrendering to the possessive hug.

Kurama smiled, and raised his head to look into the Fire Demon's eyes. "This really turns you on, doesn't it?"

Those piercing eyes again. Hiei looked away. "I wish I knew how to turn you off..."

"You already did." The Youko swayed his hips inside their embrace, rubbing his limp member on Hiei's thigh. "See? I'm finally satisfied... for now."

The youkai frowned, then grimaced. I knew there was a catch somewhere... "So you're teasing me just to make me mad? Or is it because you enjoy seeing others jacking off until they bleed?" He strongly suspected that that was what he'd be forced to do when the Youko decided to let go of him.

Kurama scowled, seeming greatly confused. "I told you I'm gonna take care of you."

"Whatever that means," Hiei muttered.

The redhead was visibly shocked. "Aren't you in the least acquainted with the concept of giving as much pleasure as you take?"

If Kurama's expression weren't so somber, the youkai would have bet that he was joking. "No. Human concept?"

When the Youko gaped, Hiei began to think he was missing something somewhere. The emerald eyes were about to make a hole in the Fire Demon's skull.

Giving as much as you take... that could only a joke, right?

On the other hand, for the first time in his life Hiei wasn't so clearly the one holding to the weak end of the rope. Despite all the barking, Kurama had accepted not to be in the lead all the time, graciously agreeing to be guided in many rounds of their dominance game. Perhaps the rules were different when the hierarchy was affected. He didn't know.

After a solemn minute keeping that puncturing stare, Kurama seemed to have reached a conclusion. "Now I really have to take care of you."

Uh-oh... As soon as he felt the Youko's weight lifting off, Hiei turned to the side, trying to escape.

Kurama smiled at the short demon's new position. "You want it that way? Okay."

The youkai was dragged closer, his right knee grabbed and hooked on the Youko's shoulder. The red soft mane brushing against his leg was both ticklish and alluring. "Now hold on," Kurama chided.

Noticing his defenseless openness before the Youko, Hiei clasped his hands on the smooth tiles, trying to haul himself away. "Fox... no, don't..."

Kurama held him firmly in place. "You really think that after you gave me such a delicious banquet I'm gonna leave you to suck your finger?"

"I have a better chance of coming by sucking my finger than with anything that you... owwwww...." The Youko was brushing feathery fingers along his ribs. Hiei couldn't even blame himself; Kurama had found out that vulnerable spot on his own, right on the first time in the kitchen.

"I think you underestimate me, Jaganshi," the redhead smirked.

"Let me go..."

"Why are you so frightened?" Kurama let his hands roam through every inch of the youkai's warm skin that he was able to reach from that position. "Relax and enjoy. Just remember not to scream. It's a very despicable thing to do, you know. I hope you can control yourself."

Hiei used his last moments of sensible thinking to gnarl as much imprecations as he had learned in his short life, many in an archaic demonic language Kurama didn't understand - which didn't matter much; the tone was unequivocal.

"You don't seem very much in control," the redhead snickered. After strolling for a little while more, Kurama's hands got to their intended destinations. The right one came to cup Hiei's balls very tenderly, while the left index finger slid down the youkai's crevice.

Hiei hid his head under his arms. His skin was numb, his muscles were sore, but that touch still flogged him with agonizing gentleness. He dimly remembered Kurama's description of Karasu's fight against an unfortunate member of the Gorenja Team; the raven-demon only touched his adversary's flesh and exploded it. The Youko's talents weren't that dissimilar...

"You know, Hiei," Kurama whispered, "I saved a trick just for this moment."

The youkai growled in dismay. Please, just blow up my groin once for all!

"Be prepared for a wild surprise, my friend..." the redhead advised, massaging Hiei's testes with indescribable care. At the same time, his left fingers found the small pucker of flesh they've been looking for.

Hiei clenched his teeth. Of all parts of his body, if one still had to be sensitive, why did it have to be that one? "Mmmmffffunnngh..."

"Need more of my special nectar, Hiei?" The left hand probed the tight ring, inserting just the very tip of a finger.

Still hiding under shielding arms, Hiei shook his head. He could still feel inside him the oily fluid Kurama had extracted from one of his flowers to use as lubricant.

"Then let's not prolong your anguish, shall we?" With one push, the Youko tucked three fingers in the narrow entrance, making the little demon groan in shock. They slid in smoothly, having no trouble in finding the tiny lump of the youkai's prostate. Hiei tried to evade the invading caress, but Kurama had a strong grip on his balls, and any movement would be doubtlessly painful.

The massage he was getting from the Youko's right hand wasn't all that exciting. It seemed deliberately coordinated, but basically worked the juncture of his testes with the groin, an area that wasn't all that sensitive in the Fire Demon's body. So he didn't learn all about me after all... But the fingers in his hole moved in and out frantically, not once missing that hateful tiny lump... Hiei wanted to cry.

"You know? I think I really like your butt," Kurama appreciated.

Uncovering his head, Hiei glanced up at the Youko out of the corner of the eye. "Then why... are you working so hard on... hmmff... ripping it... apart...?"

"Hey, I'm being careful," the redhead protested.

"Yeah... I'm just... not sure if I... can stand you being... careful... uhnn... so many times... OUCH!" Hiei punched the floor.

"Sorry... won't do this again."

Hiei spat a curse, but his tongue was already out of control and nothing intelligible came out, just a moaned hoarse hiss.

"You already know what I'm doing to you?" asked Kurama.

Nothing you didn't do already a hundred times today, that's what the Jaganshi had intended to say. However, all that came through was, "Nothhhhhhhh... aaaaaaaahh..."

"Feel it, Hiei," the Youko smiled. "It's my best trick."

The restless fingers didn't let Hiei think straight.

"Don't think," Kurama admonished, as if reading his mind. "Just feel."

The youkai gave up all congruent thought, letting the virulent sensations devour his body and spirit, vaguely hoping not to be killed by the appalling experience. But what he found was even more dreadful than he could have imagined.

That massage he had dismissed as "not so exciting"... wasn't supposed to be exciting at all. It was a real massage, with healing purposes. More to the point, Hiei was ready to come again.

And probably to have all his blood vessels blown up on the process.

"NOOOO!"

Hiei scraped the tiled floor, trying to drag himself free, but Kurama had already loosed his balls to grasp his taut shaft, pumping it firmly. The Youko's fingers still partied in his ass, and the world gradually started to quiver around the youkai.

Hiei vaguely remembered one time when all thieves of the gang that had "raised" him gathered around the fire to drink and brag about their sexual conquests, and each one started to describe the sensations of the best orgasm ever. The young youkai had kept quiet as usual; at the time the subject was unknown to him anyway.

Now, this one was hardly the best ever. He was too drained, the cold and hard floor was far from comfortable... But the feeling was different from everything he had ever heard or felt. A hot liberating wave exploded in his groin, while a chilly ripple rushed from the end of his limbs in the opposite direction. When the conflicting forces met, dark blue spots clouded his vision, until the room vanished around him.

Feeling his mind plummeting into darkness, Hiei smiled. He was finally safe.

When the piercing ring of the alarm clock crushed his ears, Kurama made a huge effort to remember which team he and his friends would be fighting that day, but his brain wasn't in any mood to cooperate. The bed felt surprisingly comfortable that morning, even the pillow didn't seem too fat and hard. He wondered if the chambermaid had finally replaced it; he had asked her to do it the day they arrived in the Ankoku Island, but apparently the hotel staff had been advised not to bother too much with the Urameshi Team's requests...

Another surprise: Hiei wasn't awake yet. The Fire Demon slept soundly, untroubled by the alarm's loud screaming. Did the maid changed the position of the beds too? The window was in the opposite side of where it should be, and Hiei's bed was so close to his.

Too close, in fact. Far too close.

Blinking the remnants of sleep away, the redhead opened wild eyes to his own room in his mother's house in Tokyo, his familiar comfortable bed with his familiar plushy pillow, and the very unfamiliar vision of a naked youkai curled in deep sleep right beside him.

His head ached terribly and he cursed the malignant god who invented the hangovers, until he realized that he hadn't drunk all that much the day before. It was the insistent ringing ripping his ears apart. Why the hell did I turn on the alarm? I don't need to go to school, do I? In his condition, he would be lucky if he lived enough to reach the front door.

A few more spins of his brain later, he recognized the ringing. The phone, not the alarm. Kuso...

He reached past Hiei to grab the machine, astonished that the youkai, usually a light sleeper, could be still asleep with that clangorous noise right next to his ear. "Moshi-moshi," he managed to say through a raspy throat.

"Good morning, Shuu-chan," Shiori's voice replied merrily. "I'm sorry, musuko, did I wake you?"

Kurama's eyes looked for the clock's dial, as he tried to figure out if it would be too suspicious if he admitted that she had in fact awakened him. Nine twenty. Not too bad. "No, I just woke up. Was up till late watching TV, I'm afraid." Please don't ask me what I watched, please...

"Well, those are your last days without school. What is vacation for, if not for having fun and waking up late?" she laughed.

Kurama sighed in relief. "That's what you've been doing too?"

"I wish. Seems the Hatanaka family considers a moral obligation to rise with the sun," she told him confidentially. "And jog three miles before breakfast."

Kurama laughed. "Poor Kaasan! Are they treating you so bad as that?"

"Not so bad," she giggled. "Kazuya's mother finally stopped comparing me to her late daughter-in-law a week ago."

"Not so bad indeed..."

"And little Shuuichi is such an adorable boy!"

Kurama groaned to himself. "I'm glad to hear it, Kaasan."

"Now Shuu-chan, don't be like that," she chided. "There's no reason to be jealous."

The redhead smirked. Was I that obvious? "I don't know, Kaasan," he suggested playfully. "What if you trade me for him? We even have the same name, you might think that nobody will notice the difference. Then he gets to eat your strawberry pies while I'll be stuck waking up before sunrise and jogging before breakfast. I better watch out for any presents you give me from now on. If you show up here with a pair of new running sneakers for me, I'll call the police."

Shiori was laughing to tears on the other side of the receiver. "No need to worry, Shuu-chan, you'll always be my baby. You know no other Shuuichi can't take your place in my heart."

He didn't want to admit, but her words fell like balsam over his worries. He was jealous. It took him one and a half millenium to find a mother that loved him so unconditionally, so unselfishly. She meant the world for him, and no skinny little ningen kid was taking her from him.

The Youko snorted. Such a mature decision from one who's a dozen centuries old...

"So," Shiori continued. "How was it in the camp?"

Kurama arched his eyebrows. Well, let's see. I went with my friends to this strange island to take part of a Martial Arts contest, but we had to kill all the other passengers in the ship, before they killed us. We stayed in this five-star hotel where everybody looked down on us as if we were goats about to be slaughtered - which wasn't far from the truth, actually. The stadium where the contest was staged was crowded with low-class demons that kept yelling I was a traitor because I was in the human team. I fought against some very interesting characters, like a ghoul that threatened to kill you, a giant sweaty bastard that beat me up after I fainted, and this psycho that fell in love with me and showed his affection blowing off bombs on me. Not to mention a fairytale character that opened a magic box and restored my old body - you know, the one with silver hair, foxtail and furry ears. Then we won the contest, but instead of seeing fireworks, the stadium exploded above our heads. And yesterday morning I had this heart-to-heart talk - or should I say mind-to-mind? - with my best friend, and as a result I brought him home to lunch. Incidentally I ended up seducing him on the kitchen table and we've been fucking each other since then non-stop, in every room of this house, except your bedroom - I think you would like to know that. We only stopped when my friend passed out, so I carried him to my bed and now he's sleeping so deeply I'm afraid I killed him. No, wait... he's still breathing, thank Inari. So that's it, your baby Shuu-chan is not a virgin anymore. He sighed. "Not much happened, Kaasan. It was kinda dull, the same people, the same games, nothing ever changes there."

"Well, there're some interesting changes coming your way, musuko," Shiori announced mischievously.

Kurama frowned, suspicious. "Kaasan, you didn't give my birth date to some astrologer again, did you?"

"No, no," she chuckled. "Nothing like that. I'll tell you when I arrive."

"Won't you even give me a hint?" he pleaded, glancing at Hiei. I'm not sure I can take any more interesting changes right now...

"If I give you any hint you'll find out in one second, you're too smart for me," she answered firmly. "And it's not the kind of thing we should talk about on the phone."

Kurama winced. Oh Inari, this sounds serious...

"Anyway," Shiori went on, "I'll be home by four o'clock, we'll talk then."

Which meant Kurama had yet a few hours to sleep before having to clean the mess he and Hiei had made of the house. "Okay, I'll have your apple tea hot and waiting for you," he promised.

"Thanks, musuko. Bye!"

"Bye, Kaasan."

There was no doubt about it. Trouble was coming his way. Somehow, Shiori's little surprises always did that to him, mostly because he had to come up with instantaneous reactions that would fit the expected from a human teen boy. Kurama was perfectly aware that he flunked those occasional tests more often than not.

But this time... He stared worriedly at the phone on his lap. He had the feeling he wouldn't like this particular surprise. Especially if it had anything to do with Kazuya Hatanaka, and his son.

He sighed, knowing how ridiculous that sounded. Hiei would laugh himself silly if he ever heard the Youko whining like that.

Kurama had to lean over him again to put the phone back on the bedside table, rocking the mattress considerably, and still Hiei slept like a log. Very differently from the light sleeper Kurama had shared the room with in the Kubikukuri Hotel. There, at the softest murmur of the breeze outside, the youkai would jump awake with his katana ready to strike. The Flying Shadow was then Jumping at Shadows... oh my, what a pathetic pun.

The redhead sat with his arms crossed, gazing down at the diminutive demon he had chosen as his first lover in this human lifetime. Well, maybe "lover" was a strong word, but it was the best he could think of at the moment. He just had to be careful not to say it aloud, or the Jaganshi might start to have crazy ideas about the depth of their relationship.

Not that Kurama knew how deep it went either. So far he had been too busy making up for sixteen years of chastity to think about that anyway. But he was quite sure that not much would ever come out from an association based on such a hysterical, deranged sex... It was good, deliriously good. But too dangerous and uncomfortable. Besides, Kurama still had his long list of reasons why he should keep the Fire Demon far away from his bed, and that list sounded even more truthful now: too short, young, weird, complicated, delicious. And "delicious" was by far the most dangerous of Hiei's qualities now.

And the item "young" was bothering greatly, markedly now that he could see the youkai's unguarded face, the eyelids still in dreamless sleep, his features free from the trademark scowling. He looked younger now than he had as the infant who bit his tail all those years back.

How old is he anyway? Kurama wondered. He appeared to be around four then... When was that? How long before I came to Ningenkai? Apart from the scenes that the Jagan had revived, his memories on the subject were hazy. But it couldn't be too long, and that would make Hiei eleven to fifteen years older than Shuuichi Minamino.

Which couldn't be truth.

Because if Hiei had been 26 when he was sent to trial for "stealing the Reikai Treasures, cruelly endangering several human lives, resisting prison and attempting murder against a Tantei in mission", Koenma would have never let him out on parole.

Kurama would never forget Koenma's face when George pointed out the page of Hiei's file where his birth date was registered. The toddler was so furious that his ears were steaming! According to the Reikai Laws, the Fire Demon wasn't old enough to be sent to prison.

Which would mean that, after molesting Hiei when he was just a baby, he had also seduced him when he was still very underage. Masaka!

"Hiei, wake up." At first gently, then more resolutely, Kurama shook the youkai's shoulders. "Wake up, now!"

The demon was sleeping so soundly that the redhead feared he'd have to slap him awake. But at last a moody scowl knitted the brows under the white bandanna and a moan of protest curved the soft thin lips. "Ahn...?"

"Wake up, Hiei."

The youkai opened one eye suspiciously, almost fearfully. "You want more?"

Kurama cringed, both at the frightened tone in his friend's voice and the memory of all the naughty plays he had enticed Hiei to do... He's not underage... he can't be. That was the logic claimed. But if he was...

Hiei gulped, and slipped his hand up Kurama's thigh. "Can't you wait a while?" he murmured. "I'm so tired..."

He's not tired, he's burned out, the Youko noticed. He grasped Hiei's hand before it made things worse. "No, Hiei, listen. We need to talk."

"We talk..." the youkai yawned, "...tomorrow..."

"Has to be now."

Hiei nuzzled the sheets - making Kurama realize that he forgot to give his friend a pillow - and huffed. "Someday I'll have my own bed..."

Kurama frowned. The little demon was making him feel worse and worse. "Hiei, this is serious."

"Spiddit out," Hiei groaned, his voice muffled by the sheets. "Am liss'nin'."

"Then look at me too."

The demon replied with such a painful moan that Kurama thought he was sobbing. But the red eyes were dry and clear when Hiei propped on his elbow to stare up at the Youko. "What?"

The redhead bit his lip, breathing deeply. Truth time.

"Hiei... Was this your first time?"

The Jaganshi blinked. Then gasped, visibly offended. "Was it that bad?"

Kurama sighed in relief. "You mean it wasn't?"

"Of course not. Where did you get that idea?"

The Youko laughed at his own anxiety and stupidity. Of course, that couldn't have been Hiei's first time. The things he did, the way he moved, the nasty talk... For Inari's sake, the way he took me on the kitchen table! And Hiei had to be at least eleven years older than Shuuichi Minamino.

But the thought of adding "virgin" to the list of reasons why he shouldn't have done it with Hiei was absolutely frightful.

The Fire Demon was almost too tired to care if the redhead was laughing at him.

Almost. "What's so funny?"

"You naughty little demon, how did you manage to fool Koenma?"

"Koenma?" That was really unfair. Hadn't he pleased the Youko enough? Didn't he earn a good night sleep? And if he had to be awakened to talk, did it really have to be about Koenma?

"Yeah, in our trial. Did you alter your files?" That was a tough trick, even for an expert thief.

Hiei moaned again. "You're sure we can't talk about it tomorrow?"

"Actually it's tomorrow already," Kurama pointed at the clock on the bedside table.

The youkai didn't bother to look. "Not for me."

Kurama petted his black hair fondly. "Okay, you can sleep a few hours more. We have time until Kaasan arrives, and I already know what I really wanted to know."

"Good." Resting his head on Kurama's lap, Hiei cuddled into a ball and closed his eyes.

He looked so cute like that. Kurama was glad to know that it was only a deceitful appearance. "You won't believe me," he commented, stroking the youkai's neck. "I almost freaked out thinking you might be really underage."

"Underage?"

"Yes, because of what happened in our trial."

Hiei shrugged slightly. "I am underage," he said, eyes still tightly closed. "Sort of."

Then Kurama freaked out. "WHAT?!"

"You're letting me sleep or not?" the youkai complained.

At this point? "You're joking, ne?" The Youko grabbed Hiei's shoulders to make him sit. "You have to be."

Hiei wiped his eyes and sighed. "What's the problem with you?"

"We met when I was still in my Youko form. About twenty years ago."

"Sixteen," Hiei corrected, and yawned. "And a few months."

Kurama frowned at the low number. He admitted he had difficulties placing his memories in their right time - he had lived more than one and half millenium after all - but it was hard to believe that that encounter had occurred so shortly before his transfer to Ningenkai.

Wait... that rabbit... I sauced it with nigyun herbs. The ones that grow under the volcanic stones of the Batsu Forest. And he had been still camping around that region when the Hunter who killed him had started his chase.

But still... "Hiei, you must be at least five years older than my human body. How old were you when we first met?"

"Here or back then?"

Inari... "Back then."

The youkai didn't hide his displeasure for the return of the old "back then" topic. "Almost two."

Kurama felt physically ill. "No."

Hiei smirked. "You wouldn't have gotten rid of me so easily if I were older," he bragged.

Horrified, the redhead crawled out of the bed. Two years old? He did... all that he did... to a two year-old little baby? And now...

I'm dreaming. Please someone tell me I'm dreaming. He stood staring in disgust at the diminutive naked body lying on his bed; he thought of Hiei's childlike features when he was asleep, and the way the youkai had savored the chocolate mousse, licking it from his fingers... NO!

Oblivious to his friend's discomfort, Hiei smiled at having the bed just for him, and made himself comfortable, hugging Kurama's rose-scented pillow. "Smells good," he mumbled sleepily.

"How could you not tell me?" Kurama barked.

"Hmmmm...?"

"Why didn't you tell me, Hiei?"

Hiei hid his head under the pillow. The Youko sat beside him and took the pillow from him.

"Damn you, Fox," the youkai protested. "You had your fun. Now let me rest, okay? You can have more fun later."

The Jaganshi hadn't intended to make his words particularly hurtful, but the effects on the Youko were devastating. "I'm sorry," Kurama whispered, returning the pillow to the youkai and arranging the bedcovers around him. "I don't know what to say, Hiei. I'm really sorry."

Seeing the hurt in his friend's emerald eyes, Hiei understood that his sleeping time was over. "Kurama, we made a deal," he reminded him. "No regrets. Forget all about it."

The Youko shook his head. "We made a deal about "back then". I'm talking about here, last night."

Hiei frowned, totally in the dark. "What about here, last night? You were a little scary, but..."

A little scary? Kurama couldn't decide which was more surprising: the "little" or the admission that Hiei had allowed something to scare him. "You were too young for it."

And that one was a complete surprise for Hiei. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"You said it yourself, you're underage."

"I said "sort of"," Hiei protested. "And I thought we were talking about Reikai's criminal code. What does that have to do with here, last night?"

"You are just a baby, you weren't ready to..."

"I'm older than you!"

"I'm about ninety times older than you!"

Hiei crossed his arms in his customary scowl. "Hn."

"Did you tell me the truth?" Kurama demanded. "I really wasn't your first?"

The youkai rolled his eyes. "Do I look like a virgin to you?"

Kurama had to admit that he didn't.

"If being my first was that important to you," Hiei snickered, "you should have gone all the way back then."

The suggestion almost caused the redhead to throw up. "I'd never..."

"Really? How old were you when you first did it?" the youkai challenged.

Kurama pursed his lips. "A lot older than you were back then." But by Reikai's perspective, still underage.

"Older than I am now?" Hiei insisted.

No answer. At least none was spoken aloud.

The Fire Demon stretched in the bed, eyeing the Youko with curiosity. "It's so weird when you do that..."

"Do what?"

"Start thinking like a ningen."

Usually Hiei would use the word "ningen" as an insult, and Kurama had a proper reply ready on the tip of his tongue; but he swallowed it when he saw the grave expression on the demon's face. "I am human, Hiei."

"Hn. Only when you think it's convenient. You just bragged to be ninety times older than me, remember?"

"All I meant is that I remember having lived this long," the Youko countered. "This body might still be young, but my memories gave me experience enough to..."

"Fox, my brain is crammed with memories," Hiei reminded him. "Probably more than you could keep in yours even if you had lived ten thousand years."

"That's different!"

"Different from what? What are you talking about?"

Kurama breathed deeply, doing his best to calm down. "You said you're sort of underage. What does that mean?"

"That Reikai Laws are bullshit," Hiei snorted. "They prescribe different penalties depending on the convict's age, you know that. I was old enough to be sent to prison, but not to be sentenced to labor in Enma's mines, or to have extra distresses added to my next incarnation. Anyway, I didn't want to go to prison, so..."

"You changed your file?"

"Not exactly. I bribed someone to do it for me."

"Who?"

"None of your business."

"And how? You didn't have that kind of money."

Hiei yawned and shrugged. "No cash. Paid with services."

The Youko glowered at him. "What... kind... of services?" He wasn't sure he wanted to know.

The Jaganshi read his mind and huffed, acutely annoyed. "First I'm a virgin, now I'm whore. No, Fox, it's not what you're thinking."

"Then tell me."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Coz it's none of your business. Or mine," Hiei added.

So the secret belonged to the one Hiei had bribed. And curiously the youkai respected that person enough to keep his mouth shut. Interesting. "Why didn't you ask me?"

"What?"

"To try and change your file?"

Hiei smirked. "You were the one who put me in jail!"

Kurama fell tiredly on the mattress, resting his head next to his friend's shoulder. "I'd have helped you..."

"Maybe. Maybe not. Didn't feel like risking my only chance of freedom trusting you. Sorry."

That was a dead-end argument, and Kurama knew it. But he had other worries to deal with anyway. "Was I your second?"

"Nope."

"Your third?"

"I don't wanna know my number in your list," Hiei countered. "Why is this bothering you so much?"

"You're just a baby!"

"Stop calling me that, Fox!"

"You stop calling me fox!"

They glared at each other in silence for a moment.

Kurama's anger receded first. "Are you okay? Did I hurt you?"

"Just as much as I hurt you," Hiei retorted.

Not a comforting answer. "Hiei... I didn't mean to force you to..."

The Jaganshi prevented him to continue by grabbing his wrist resolutely. "Listen to me, Fox, because I'm not saying this twice. You didn't force me. You didn't have to. I knew what I was getting into when I accepted your invitation to lunch. Will you drop it now?"

Kurama sighed, still feeling a bitter taste in his throat. He shifted to lay beside the youkai, aghast with himself, with the memories of a Youko molesting a baby demon, with the realization that he had seduced his best friend disregarding a detail as important as the possibility of Hiei being underage.

"Kurama, I won't lie, I don't understand why you strain yourself so much trying to fit the ningen world and its conventions," Hiei admitted, letting go of the Youko's arm. "But I am not human. All this stuff you're saying means very little to me."

The redhead pursed his lips. "Child abuse is not acceptable in Makai either, baby."

"No one in Makai would dare to call me baby, Fox," Hiei riposted. "Except someone begging to be killed. You know quite well that there's no 'underage' issue in Makai. One is considered mature after making his first kill alone. And I made mine when I was three days-old."

The Youko gasped. "You killed a youkai at only three days-old?!"

"Not a youkai," Hiei grumbled. "A dog. But it was six times my size and it thought I was dinner," he added, zealous of his pride.

Which was totally unnecessary. Kurama was deeply impressed. "How did you kill it?"

"Bit its neck," the little demon answered, his sharp fangs showing between grinning lips. "No one had fed me, and I guess I was much hungrier than the dog was."

Kurama passed a protective arm around the youkai's waist. The Demon World was a tough place for youngsters, death taking too many before they could stand up on their own. But Hiei's childhood was barbaric, even for Makai standards.

Seeing the sudden sadness gleaming in those green eyes, Hiei shrugged, trying to light things up. "It was a good thing, you know. After I killed the fourth dog of the gang, the thieves started to feed me every morning. I presume they thought it was cheaper that way."

Kurama hugged him, hiding his face against the youkai's neck. He felt deeply touched by the fiery spirit of this diminutive Fire Demon.

Hiei didn't snuggle, his bones didn't melt. "Fox, I wanna ask you something," Hiei sighed. "Will you be honest?"

The redhead moaned. "I'll try, if you just stop calling me that."

"Are you always like this in bed?"

The Youko gazed at him out the corner of the eye. "Like what?" Good? Passionate? Creative? Ardent? Resourceful?

"Like you're about to devour your mate alive and gnaw the bones?"

The redhead blushed, smiling meekly. "It's been sixteen years, you know. I guess I was a little..."

"Whatever you're gonna say, "little" is not the word for it," Hiei cut him out.

"I'm sorry, baby. I didn't mean to scare you."

"I'm not a baby!" the youkai snarled.

"But you were scared," Kurama grinned. "You already said so."

Hiei glared at the ceiling. "Who wouldn't be? I was trying to guess how I was going to die; if you would bite my jugular and suck my blood..."

"No way," the redhead trembled. "I saw Kuromomo Tarou doing that and it wasn't a pleasant view."

"...or if you would fry my brain with that little last trick of yours," the youkai continued.

"Liked that, didn't you?" Kurama nudged him, proudly. "Sometimes I even amaze myself."

The Jaganshi smirked; at least the Youko wasn't apologizing anymore. He couldn't stand hearing more apologies for acts that had ultimately benefited him. It didn't feel right.

"For what it's worth, I was scaring myself too," Kurama confessed. "It's been centuries since I last had sex completely out of despair like this." Belatedly, he realized how insulting his comment could be taken.

Hiei grimaced. "I don't think I ever did it if not out of despair..."

The Youko winced. I deserved that. "There's one thing I can tell you, baby. It's not healthy to hold up for too long."

"Certainly it's not healthy to the one you get despaired with, Fox, that I can tell you."

Kurama scowled at him. "Would you just stop...?"

"...calling me baby?" Hiei amended.

The redhead hugged him tighter. The little demon insisted on not melting his bones, and that was seriously annoying the Youko. "Why?"

Hiei's eyes widened. "Why don't I want you calling me baby?" Did he really have to explain that?

"Why only out of despair? You're not like me. There's nothing to stop you from having sex whenever you want."

Adjusting the bedcovers around them, Hiei took a while to reply. "I do it whenever I want. It's just that sex is not something I care so much about."

Kurama cleaned his throat noisily. "Could have fooled me..."

"Forget it, okay?" asked the youkai. "You wouldn't understand."

Inari, he looks so defenseless like this... Had Hiei looked as childlike and fragile as that to the one who first seduced him? Did I look like that when I was a kit? Because the Jaganshi had a point: Youko Kurama had lost his virginity very, very early too. "When was your first time, Hiei?"

The youkai yawned again. "Why? Will you tell me about yours?"

"Of course not."

"Then shut up and let me sleep."

Kurama shrugged. "It was too long ago, I don't remember."

"Oh really? My poor Fox!" Hiei patted his head mockingly. "You're getting senile already! Maybe you're too old for this kind of activity."

Kurama slapped the young demon's butt. "Shut up, baby. I'm entitled to my secrets."

But now Hiei was too curious to stop. "I don't believe it. A Youko who doesn't want to brag about his sexual deeds? Usually one has to gag them to stop their blabber."

"Youkos don't blabber!" Kurama protested. "And we're very discreet."

The Jaganshi ignored his indignation. "Unless you don't have anything to brag about..." he suggested, and studied his friend's face closely for a reaction.

To be rewarded by the sight of a sudden paleness sweeping the Youko's cheeks.

Obviously, Hiei hit very close to the mark. He risked a guess. "You couldn't get it up."

Widened green eyes signaled 'bull's eye'.

Hiei burst out in uncontrollable laughter, too loud in Kurama's ear.

"I was a kit!" the redhead claimed. "I was nervous, okay?"

The youkai was laughing so hard that Kurama feared all his neighbors would hear. "Oh my," Hiei panted. "The great and mighty Youko Kurama... fizzled out... This is priceless."

"Quit it, Hiei!" Kurama slapped him again, on the butt, back, arms, thigh, head, not hard enough to really hurt, but in a clear warning to put an end to the mockery. Either the youkai stopped giggling soon or the Youko would have to give up what little remained of his pride by joining the laughter. Hiei's laugh was one of those really contagious ones, rare and rich.

Hiei hugged him tight to escape the playful beating, and Kurama found himself nestling the youngster in his arms, even if the jeering chuckle still vibrated loud against his neck. "Baka," the Youko grumbled in good mood. "Don't you know you're supposed to tell me it's okay, that it's quite normal, that I don't have to succeed every time?"

"You want me to comfort you? Why?" The Fire Demon breathed in deeply and wiped his eyes, trying to calm down. "You didn't fail with me. Besides, I feel much better knowing you're not infallible. It's really hard to keep up with you."

Kurama bit the youkai's slender neck. "You do realize that now that you know my weakness, I'm gonna have to kill you?"

"You're welcome to try, Fox," Hiei smirked.

Kurama smiled. Big hug, no bones. "Your turn, baby," he riposted. "Your first time."

"I didn't say I would tell you."

"Be fair. I just told you my darkest secret."

"You didn't tell me," the youkai reminded him.

"Whatever. Tell me."

"No."

"Tell me or get ready to be tickled to death."

Hiei glared daggers at the redhead. "You wouldn't dare."

"At this point you should know me better than that."

"There's not much to tell," Hiei huffed. Then, with a wink, "I succeeded."

The redhead pinched the youkai's earlobe in reprimand. "Spit it out, baby."

"Ouch, okay..." Hiei sat up on one elbow, caressing the Youko's chest with lazy fingertips. "I meant it though, there's not much of a story. It was a cold night, everyone in the gang was freezing to death, and this guy came to lie beside me saying it was warmer around me. He hugged me."

Kurama's lip twitched. "Say no more."

"And now you know my weakness too," Hiei gazed tenderly at his friend.

Petting the fluffy spiky hair, the Youko sighed. "All right. I won't kill you then."

"Thanks, Fox."

That dark hair was so unbelievably soft; Kurama wondered how it would feel to caress a cloud. "How old were you?"

Hiei frowned. "You're not done with that yet, are you?"

Not completely. It wasn't quite the age issue, but there was still something about the whole matter that still bothered Kurama. "I mean, were you okay with it? Did you really want it? Did he hurt you?"

The youkai snorted. "Of course he hurt me, he was four times my size. But he didn't hurt me on purpose, I guess. He just didn't care. And come to think of it, I didn't care if he hurt me or not." He offered the redhead a sad smile. "That's what despair is all about."

Shivering inside, Kurama stroke his friend's shoulders gently. That was exactly what had happened between them, right? They had hurt each other a few times, exchanged some unworried apologies and went on with the frantic screwing. And I promised myself to take care of you... Hypocrite!

"You're doing it again," Hiei sighed.

"What?"

"Thinking like a ningen."

Kurama frowned. "I don't think I can help it."

"You're just wasting your time with senseless worries."

I'm worried about you, baby. Is this senseless? The Youko ran his fingers along Hiei's bandaged arm. Maybe it is. "Why did you say you don't care much about sex?"

"You won't understand, Youko."

Youko? Not Fox? Kurama knew his friend well. Veiled message. It's not something a Youko would understand. Well, of course I don't understand not caring much about sex! And I'm not disappointed because he didn't call me "fox", I hate being called like that. "No way, you won't convince me," Kurama retorted. "I bet you can't number five things that are better than sex."

Hiei groaned. "Believe what you want, I don't care." He shifted for a more comfortable position to sleep.

"Oi, you're not sleeping now," the redhead nudged him. "Tell me. Only five things. Doesn't even need to be in a merit order or anything."

"Oh shut up, stupid Fox!" Hiei moaned. He really liked the sound of that nickname. I think I'm gonna keep it...

Kurama bit his earlobe in retaliation. "Five things, baby."

On the other hand... If he ever calls me that in public, he's a dead fox! "A deaf and dumb Youko, for starters..." Hiei suggested.

Easily turning the small light body around, Kurama pinned him to the mattress, lying right on the youkai's chest. "Seriously, Hiei. Five things."

The Fire Demon struggled a little but not very convincingly. Kurama had no doubt that even being a lot heavier than the short youkai, Hiei would have no trouble shoving him off.

Eventually, Hiei sighed and relaxed. "Okay, okay... will you let me sleep then?"

"I promise," the redhead nodded.

The youkai leaned back against the pillows, his eyes staring thoughtfully at the ceiling. "A long dreamless sleep."

Kurama grimaced. "I said seriously, Hiei!"

"I am serious," Hiei replied, a somewhat longing tone in his low voice. "After training real hard, or after a difficult fight, when I get so tired that I just fall asleep wherever I land..."

"Like you did last night?" Kurama suggested.

"Yeah," the youkai agreed reluctantly. "But the best time was when I used the Kokuryuuha against Bui. You know, ne? Those times when you wake up exactly in the same position you lay down, because your body and mind are so exhausted and so deep in sleep that you don't even shift during the night?"

Kurama frowned. It happened to him too, and he admitted it felt really good to wake up completely rested and unworried. But... "Better than sex?" He didn't believe it. "Dreaming is good."

Hiei fingered the sidelocks of the other's crimson hair. "You do know I have a perfect memory, don't you?" he asked softly.

The Youko winced. "Yeah, I forgot."

Hiei smiled fondly. "Did you? Curious. I don't even know what 'forgetting' really means. The closer thing I got is the dreamless nights. I can look back at those moments and see just a... a black void where the images and sounds and smells and emotions should be. I like that, to remember those nights. Remember the void. Feels relieving."

Kurama's lips twitched. It was not a sensation he could really grasp, although it sounded like a blessing for a perennially strained mind like Hiei's. He wondered if that was also a reason, besides survival, why he kept practicing so hard, so long and so often. "Right," he accepted. "That's one."

Letting the red tresses coil around and between his fingers, the youkai drowned into sad recollections, guarding a moment of silence before speaking again. "I had a jewel," he murmured.

"A jewel?" Kurama blinked. Fortune over sex? He never suspected Hiei would be one of those...

"A hiruiseki," the youkai described. "From my mother. She cried it for me when I was born."

"Oh..." Definitely not one of those then...

"I used to spend hours just staring at it, seeing its shades changing against the light, feeling it in my hand, sensing it. I could forget myself just by sitting still and looking at it."

I thought you didn't know the meaning of forgetfulness, Kurama grinned kindly. "You never showed it to me," he commented, trying to muffle the slight resentment in his voice. Sure, Hiei knew better than showing off his treasures to a notorious thief like Youko Kurama. But still they were friends, ne? The Jaganshi should know that he could trust him.

The youkai sighed, his sorrow all too visible in his ruby eyes. "I lost it years ago. Before coming to Ningenkai."

Kurama kissed the young demon's cheek for comfort. He knew the story of Hiei's birth, and guessed the hiruiseki was probably the only memento of his mother that the Fire Demon had owned. "Two," he whispered, trying to divert his friend's attention from the painful subject.

A deep breath signaled that the youkai caught the hint. His face assumed a thoughtful expression once more... until it was crossed by a shy, subtle, almost indistinguishable grin. "Yukina's smile..."

The Youko held him closer, sweetly nuzzling his neck. It was not something he could argue with. There were very few sounds more enchanting for Kurama than his mother's laugh. "Three."

Hiei responded to the caress, resting his arms around Kurama's shoulders. "Hugs."

Now, that was arguable. "Hugs better than sex? Sex is full of hugs. And with you, hugs are sex."

"Not necessarily," Hiei answered, blushing. "Not always. I doubt you would be turned on by someone jumping over you and rubbing your prick, were this someone an ugly stinky horrible monster."

"You could be surprised..." the Youko groaned.

Hiei sighed. It was a Youko he was talking to, after all. "No, I wouldn't be surprised. Some people would consider you a heretic or something for sleeping with a Forbidden Child, you know."

"You are not an ugly stinky horrible monster," Kurama countered.

"That's not what I've been told," Hiei murmured somberly.

Kurama kissed him sweetly, parting his lips to caress that small warm mouth with his tongue. Their mouths were acrid by the sleep, but the lingering sense of loneliness and despair ignored the detail, concentrating on the urgency of the caring touch. When he felt Hiei's bones melting again inside their hug, Kurama gently parted the kiss, before they both got crazy. The game wasn't over. "I think I missed your point. You say that if an ugly stinky horrible monster hugs you, you won't want to have sex with him, but it will feel better than if you did?"

Hiei blinked. Did I say that? But after analyzing the sentence once more, he nodded. "Yes. If it's really a monster."

Kurama tried real hard. Really, he did. But that concept was even more intricate to grasp than the 'remember the void' one. "Baby, this makes no sense at all."

"Sex often hides secret agendas," Hiei explained. "In Makai the only reasons why people hug each other are if they are freezing in a chilly night or if they really mean it. I don't know why, but there everybody is very straightforward about hugging."

It was something Kurama had never thought about before. Demons could be terribly misleading and insincere in their relationships, just like humans. But in Makai it was less common to witness physical demonstrations of affection. The Youko admitted that the few times he had seen two youkai hugging he readily assumed he was before two creatures who truly cared for each other, either in a brotherly fashion or in something more. The idea of deceit never crossed his mind. On the other hand, Kurama had three or four classmates who would always approach him with friendly hugs and pats on the back in order to get help with the exams. The jerks...

But during sex... Hiei was right. Mostly there was a tacit agreement among demons: "we can screw now, but don't ask me for favors tomorrow." If that weren't the case, it would be openly discussed between the partners. That worked especially for youkos, and especially for Kurama. In long centuries of living, he could list only a handful of people he had slept with that he had sincerely cared about in a way or another - although not to the point of drawing the need for open discussion. Life was quite simpler that way.

Hiei presented him an easy, correct calculation: no matter the situation, you could count that a non-sexual hug from a monster would be a sincere statement of affection, while the same couldn't be said about a horny Youko jumping over his best friend and rubbing his prick.

"So that guy... your first," Kurama whispered. "It was just because of the cold?"

Hiei frowned in remembrance. "I don't know. I think he cared about me a little. He used to look at me in a different way. Kind. Concerned, sometimes. But when he touched me, I told him what I am, and I think that changed his mind. He never talked to me again."

"What? Why?"

"He was devoted to the elemental gods of Water and Ice."

The redhead moaned to himself. Precisely the sort of moron that takes that 'forbidden child' rubbish seriously. "So why did you tell him?"

"I didn't think it would be fair," the youkai shrugged.

Not for the first time Kurama wondered where that sense of morality came from. Hiei probably had all the reasons in the universe not to mind anyone's feelings, especially of those who thought the worst of him simply because of his origins. "You cared about him, didn't you?" he asked in a soft whisper.

The sigh that came from the little demon's lips was so full of longing and sorrow that the redhead immediately regretted the question. "He hugged me," he murmured.

Kurama winced at the tone. Hiei was too tired, and the change in their relationship was still blurry and indefinite. The youkai was having trouble keeping his usual barriers in place, and inadvertently offered glimpses of a new dimension of his heart that the Youko had never dreamt to see. And I didn't even have the guts to tell him about my first time, Kurama lamented. He closed his eyes, tightening their hug. "Does this one count?" he inquired. It felt so good...

The Fire Demon let his arm caress Kurama's back lovingly, breathing in the herbal perfume of the red mane. "I'm afraid not," he sighed.

Kurama bit his lip sadly. He had the same impression, yes. There was still too much despair there.

"But yesterday in the hotel..." Hiei suggested hopefully. "I mean, I guess you were feeling kind of guilty, but..."

Kind of guilty? The Youko scowled. That didn't even begin to describe it. But the guilt had risen exactly from the idea of having been one of the cruel bastards that so stupidly hurt this young Fire Demon he cared so much about. More than guilt, that embrace had contained a solemn promise and the gratitude for a remarkable friendship. "It counted, baby," he whispered. "I give you my word." He dimly wondered how much Hiei would value Youko Kurama's word.

Hiei didn't know. But he admitted that that 'baby' thing was starting to rub off on him, especially when the redhead said it in such a soft tender tone.

They kept hugging in silence for many minutes, each one immersed in his own universe of awe and doubt.

"Hey, you're not sleeping, ne?" Kurama spoke at last, pinching the youkai's nipple. "There's still one to go."

"Ouch," Hiei groaned. He wasn't sleeping, but he was hoping the annoying Youko was. "Cut it out, Fox!"

"One more, baby, and I let you sleep," Kurama promised.

"You better," the youkai grumbled threateningly.

"You should thank me, baby," the redhead teased. "I'm just trying to tire you to a deep dreamless sleep."

"You risk tiring me to death," Hiei riposted.

Kurama laughed. "Come on, baby, just one more."

Hiei snorted. Actually he already had the last thing in mind since the beginning of that game. It felt awkward to voice it though.

"Fighting beside you."

Kurama's eyes widened wild. Not only for the sudden and very rare compliment from his partner, but also because that curious statement would put Hiei in another peculiar gallery of 'one of those'. "You rather fight than fuck?"

Hiei scowled. That was a weird way to put it. "When we fight together, I know you. I know the way you think, how you're going to move the next second, and how you expect me to match your moves. I don't have to worry about your human thinking. I can trust you."

That was undoubtedly the most beautiful thing Hiei had ever said to him, but... "You mean you don't trust me while we're having sex?"

"Of course not."

The redhead gulped. "Wow. Thanks..."

Done with the miserable conversation that was keeping him awake, Hiei smoothed the pillow under his head, determinate to sleep. "Don't tell me you're offended."

"Shouldn't I be?"

"Trusting people is like demanding a commitment," the youkai yawned. "Demanding that those people remain loyal to you. I don't expect you to be loyal to me, except when we fight together."

"Why not?" Okay, I betrayed him once, and I did all those horrible things, but... He rolled his eyes. Okay, so I can't think of a single reason why he should trust me, but still...

"Because you already try to be loyal to too many people." Hiei moaned, his eyelids refusing to stay open for a second more. "Your human mother, Yusuke, Kuwabara, Koenma, me, yourself... and you're lying to all of us."

"I'm not!"

"Are too. And you won't be able to keep those lies for long now that you've been inside your Youko body again. Soon you're gonna start betraying those people, and I'm very sure your first choice will be me. Will you let me sleep now?"

More than ever Kurama wanted to shake him awake and force him to explain himself. But even if he weren't feeling so bad about keeping the exhausted youkai up for so long, Hiei had already fallen asleep right after his last word.

And to think I was worried he'd take a casual fuck too seriously... Kurama shook his head. Apparently Hiei didn't even take their friendship seriously!

But then...

Was he right?

Kurama believed in loyalty, even back in his Youko days - despite what the gossip about him claimed. But as everything in life, loyalty had limits. Sometimes he had realized he had been loyal to the wrong people and had promptly corrected his mistakes. Sometimes loyalty exacted a price that just couldn't be paid. He had learned that ten centuries before, with one rebellious member of the first gang of thieves he had leaded, a reckless hotheaded youkai called Yomi. There were stern limits to friendship and trust.

And who would know better than a Forbidden Child? One who had gasped at the thought of "giving as much as you take"... A soft blow of the blood-scented wind from the demon world was enough to freeze the kindest heart.

Hiei cuddled trustingly to the Youko, offering warmth and affection. The image was so sweet and deceitful as one of Shuuichi Minamino's smiles.

The Jaganshi wasn't a fragile baby at all. And I'm not a gentle human boy. Their embrace felt cozy, safe, familiar and heartwarming, but in reality a sharp knife of ice separated their bodies and souls. The cold blade would be there to remind them of the truth of their origins, until the day they saw a rainbow bridge built across the ice-rimmed lake in their hearts...

Nuzzling the white starburst in Hiei's hair, Kurama closed his eyes and allowed himself to sleep a little bit more.