Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
26 June, 1992

Dear Mrs Weasley,

          I am pleased to inform you that your youngest son, Mr Ronald Weasley, has been cleared from the hospital wing this morning. Madam Pomfrey kept him under observation for the night only to make sure that he suffered no serious consequences from his unfortunate accident with my giant chessboard—the white queen hit him hard in the head, leaving him unconscious for a few minutes, but thank Merlin he was up and about shortly afterwards. He will be attending his classes this afternoon as usual, and as the accident occurred after the conclusion of the exams, his brief absence shouldn’t cause much of a nuisance.

          On the other hand, Messrs Frederick and George Weasley will be serving detention again, cleaning the toilets every night of this last week before summer holidays. It’s their seventeenth detention this year, their fifty-third since they were admitted at Hogwarts. I long ago gave up owling you every time the twins are caught in the act of breaking the school rules, for I would need a bird exclusively for this task, but this time I’m afraid they have crossed the line of common sense.

          Under the pretext of cheering up a sick friend (Mr Harry Potter, Ronald’s classmate), Frederick and George vandalised the Prefects’ bathroom and stole a lavatory seat, which was later found beside Mr Potter’s bed in the hospital wing with a "quick recovery" note signed by both. Even if I don’t doubt their good intentions, they have not only damaged school property, but their anti-hygienic prank has threatened the health of the children under Madam Pomfrey’s care—something she doesn’t take lightly. And furthermore, when questioned about their judgement, George—or was it Frederick?—claimed "it was all Mum’s idea".

          Naturally, I wouldn’t believe it for a second, Mrs Weasley. The very concept that you would help your children with their capers is absolutely ludicrous. Conversely, I dare to suggest that a little more discipline is in order when dealing with this pair. This school has not seen such an astounding, exasperating, uncorrectable class of troublemakers in twenty years!

          Besides, as a former Gryffindor, you must realise how these boys’ dubious sense of humour can be detrimental to our beloved House and our hopes of winning the House Cup. Even with Mr Charles Weasley’s remarkable performances at Quidditch as our Seeker, Slytherin has managed to win the House Cup for the last seven years. If Frederick and George devoted to classes half the effort and attention they have dedicated to rule-breaking, with their intelligence and application, I am certain this sad picture could be reversed.

          Yours sincerely,

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Written by Morgan D.
December 24th, 2002

Harry Potter and its characters belong to J.K.Rowling, Bloomsbury, Warner Bros and Merlin-knows-whom-else. I'm just having some fun while patiently waiting for the fifth book.