December 12, 1992

My Esteemed Colleague Prof. Snape,

        I've been looking for you for the past couple of days, but apparently you have the knack of always being at the very opposite end of the castle from where I am!  I hope you don't feel like I'm avoiding you, my friend.  Fame can sometimes be a burden, as so many come asking for my help or advice, making it hard for me to find time to myself or to engage in a friendly chat with my distinguished colleagues.  But I can't neglect a poor soul in need of assistance, can I?

        I have splendid news!  Last Thursday the Headmaster visited my quarters — I believe he's heard about my dazzling collection of Kelpie hooves and used the excuse of lending me a book on Pixies to see if he could take a peek at it.  Isn't it funny?  Lending a book about dark creatures to a Defence Against Dark Arts teacher!  Good old Albus has such a sense of humour!  Of course, he's the Headmaster, so I indulged him with a thorough exhibit of my gallery of souvenirs from all the exciting expeditions I've made and never once mentioned how easily I could see through his stratagem.  No point in embarrassing an old man, right?  (By the way, don't be shy, you're more than welcome to drop by and appreciate my hunting trophies as well — no need to bribe me or lend me any books, I assure you!)

        On the course of his visit, the Headmaster and I discussed what a shame it is that Hogwarts doesn't presently offer any Duelling classes, especially since I, Gilderoy Lockhart, the six times champion of Laos Wizard Duel Challenge, am here.  We agree that although this time of peace spares the children from the need of learning advanced battling spells at an early age like I had to in my childhood — your late youth, I suppose —, the sport of Duelling has no rival in teaching the youngsters about discipline, sense of honour, competitive spirit and, naturally, elegance and grace of movement.

        The Headmaster was ecstatic when I told him I'd be willing to teach the students the classical arts of Duelling.  As we wouldn't want to alter the current schedule of daily classes, we agreed that the best solution is to set the Duelling lessons as an extracurricular activity to be offered on Wednesday nights, by 8 o'clock, in the Great Hall.  Participation will therefore be optional, but what child would let this chance pass?  I'll be ready to start next Wednesday, the 16th.

        However, as the Headmaster very cleverly pointed out, it would be wise if I had an assistant, someone with whom I could demonstrate the trickiest spells.  After all, we wouldn't want the children to be harmed in any way, and they would be at a terrible disadvantage duelling against me.  Professor Flitwick's name was mentioned; apparently he was a decent duellist in his days and has a bit of a reputation in that department — but for that very reason I don't think it would be appropriate or honourable to pull him into this.  The kids might expect him to be still up to his reputation, and I'd be mortified if I caused him to face an awkward defeat in front of all the students.

        That's why I turn to you, my friend.  The Headmaster told me you're not a bad duellist yourself and that you'd be pleased to be my sparring-partner.  You have my word that I'll be careful not to hit you with anything permanent or too nasty, of course!  We wouldn't want to lose you, would we?

        Please let me know if you can manage, as soon as possible.

        Yours faithfully,

PS: You might have heard some rumours about me guiding Harry Potter through his Quidditch training, but I'd like to assure you that I had nothing to do with the Gryffindor victory against Slytherin three weeks ago.  He has indeed asked me for some tips — he must have found out somehow that I was once invited to try for the National Squad as a Seeker —, but I'm afraid I had to frustrate the poor boy's expectations.  I could not favour this or that team, since my picking sides would ruin any chances of an evenly matched competition.  Unless you'd like me to train your Seeker too?

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written by Morgan D.
March 9th, 2003

Gilderoy Lockhart, Severus Snape and all the characters mentioned above are part of the Harry Potter novel series, belonging to their author, J.K. Rowling, and her associates, such as Bloomsbury, Scholastic Books, Warner Bros, and Merlin-knows-who-else.  I'm just trying to entertain myself and other Potteric fans while patiently waiting for the 5th book of the series.