14 July, 1995

Dear Severus,

          For your skills and willingness to brew me the potion, your existence is dear to me. No hypocrisy here. And I shall not be content with only one child saved from being ravaged at moonlight. There cannot be any child in danger from me. No, never.

          I am very aware of what I am and of the irreparable damage I can cause, Severus. While others might say you’re being overzealous and even paranoid, I understand your fears concerning my presence at Hogwarts, my carefulness in handling the potion, my readiness to drink it... and I do understand your fears concerning my very existence. The possibilities you dread... that’s the material my nightmares are made of. The day someone is harmed because of my condition won’t see me live through it. That would be my end. Period.

          To live on, I must take my responsibilities with all the seriousness and gravity they entail. I must also take the risk of trusting your generosity towards me. I feel awfully sorry for the poor fellow who should ever taste your deadly hatred; I don’t doubt you could make his final moments so agonising that he would hope for impaling and disembowelling as quicker, more merciful ways to go. I take comfort from the thought that you are too clever and sensible to endanger your reputation as potions master on a foolish whim, whereas my death wouldn’t benefit you enough to make me a worthy prey.

          Obviously our dictionaries have different significations for the term "hostility". Mine describes "hostile" as "showing strong dislike or enmity; very unfriendly". Yours seems to define "hostile" as mine defines "murderous". Maybe we should borrow Professor Dumbledore’s dictionary and figure what his expectations are.

          I wouldn’t dare question your knowledge of herbs and flowers. You were always as good in Herbology as in Potions. However, I have to ask: what kind of roses have you been smelling? Sirius spent twelve years in Hell, you said it yourself. Harry was orphaned, scarred, and Lord Voldemort has again proved himself capable of hurting him. And James is dead! You call this "walking away unscathed"? One thing I can be proud of is my sense of smell. And I assure you, escaped convicts, bleeding boys and decomposing corpses don’t smell like any proverbial rose.

          Besides, I have never considered you a lesser mortal, and I pity anyone who does.

          I said you were a very-reluctant-to-admit dogperson, and you keep demonstrating it with your every kind word about me and my lodger. I do believe you’re indeed compatible with snakes though. Curiously, the same can be said of Harry, isn’t that right?

          Severus, aren’t we too old to sneak frogs under people’s blankets? Oh well. Perhaps we’re not. (It probably didn’t work with Neville Longbottom, did it?)

          Thankfully, when we were younger you didn’t think of pranks as a waste of intelligence and creativity. Our school days wouldn’t have been nearly as funny and thrilling if you weren’t there to challenge us.

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written by Morgan D.
January 1st, 2003

Harry Potter and its characters belong to J.K. Rowling, Bloomsbury, Warner Bros and Merlin-knows-whom-else.
The definition for "hostile" was taken from Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary of Current English, fourth edition (1989).
I'm just having some fun while patiently waiting for the fifth book.